Trust

Dave Eggers has a great section on trust in his new appendix. It’s about halfway down the first page. He ends his little story with these words. The point is that trust is usually rewarded, even though trust is sometimes violated, horribly. Trust is fun. It is fun to trust strangers. It is fun to risk what you can reasonably risk – like, your car, or your reputation – on the trust of people you know only through something ephemeral shared, something like taste in books or cartoons, or having watched people suffer.

I couldn’t have put it better. I’ve always been trusting. For the longest time, I expected nothing less than kindness and good intentions. I spent my whole childhood being made fun of and singled out. Karen the weird one. Karen the ugly one. Karen the bookworm. I never fit in. I was blessed with conniving and cruel friends who took every opportunity to talk behind my back and make fun of me to my face. Yet I still didn’t lose my trust in the humankind.

I grew bitter and private. But finally I met people who appreciated me more and more. I came to the States and found people that even understood me. It became easier to trust people.

The thing is, if you don’t trust people, you’re not even giving them a chance. Assuming that people will disappoint you and let you down will only invite such people into your life. I think that when you give them the opportunity, people love to surprise you. Most people are too scared to trust. It’s too hard and too painful.

I believe we’re all born trusting and that somehow something happens that changes our mind about what the core of a person is. We become mistrusting, we become cynical, we become afraid. But you can’t run away from people. You can’t spend your life alone. You can’t give in to fear. This is your life and you need to take control and live as you please. Trust, in the right hands, has magical outcomes. Giving up on trust is like giving up on the humankind.

You might as well give up on life.

Start small. Risk things you can afford to. Let people amaze you.

Previously? Fighting.