There is so much going on lately. I feel like I am carrying a million feelings simultaneously:
Anxiety for some changes I know are coming but don’t know what or how. I worry in the face of the unknown.
Grief for people I love who are suffering or struggling.
Joy for my oldest who accepted a summer job that he’s excited about.
Overwhelm with all I have to do but can’t muster the motivation for.
Disappointment for not being able to shed some bad habits I am so ready to be rid of.
Pride for my progress at the climbing gym and at my decent run at an 11a today.
Sorrow for reasons I can’t pinpoint but is here anyway.
Anticipation around vaccination and when it might ever be our turn and what it might mean.
Anger and despair for all the racism and hate that seems to be exploding exponentially.
Overwhelm and worry about the wellbeing of my kids. My husband.
Yearning to see my parents and family again in person. To hug my friends.
Fatigue due to a combination of emotional, physical, and mental overflow.
And overwhelming gratitude for the very large collection of privilege and luck I have.
All of this lives inside of me at every moment of every day. Different ones pop up at different times but it’s all jumbled in there and I am making space to acknowledge and sit with all of it.
Yes to living the width and the length of my life.
#yearofyes #karenikayearofyes
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