Nice People

I hate nice people.

Is hate too strong a word? Ok, let me try again.

Nice people make my skin crawl.

People aren’t nice by nature. We all have good sides and bad sides. If you ever meet people who claim they’ve never harbored negative thoughts, I guarantee you that they’re lying. Or even worse, they might be fooling themselves.

I am in the process of dealing with someone who is nice. He is so nice that he never challenges anything. He won’t give his opinion on the matter discussed. He sits on the corner and nods. When asked if he agrees he will utter “we’ll see.”

I hear those little words and my brain translates them to, “I know it’s a stupid idea but I’ll wait until you fail so I can rub it in your face.” Which, of course, drives me absolute bananas. This way, he never says anything so his ideas can’t be wrong and those of us who put ourselves out there by presenting our thoughts are open for criticism. And he never said anything, so he is not mean or difficult.

And I feel bad talking to him cause what am I to say? He didn’t bash the idea. If I ask him to express an opinion, he says, “I will when I have a strong one.” So I feel like yelling, but I bite my lips. What has he done wrong?

Nice people force you to become mean. Since decisions have to be made, the complacent person forces the other person to dominate. You are the one who has to resolve matters. It might sound like it’s fun to make all the decisions but trust me, it gets old.

Being so utterly nice is a copout. It’s making sure that others decide for you. That others take the risks and possibly face the consequences. It also means that the complacent person is suppressing the negative thoughts, which often come out in forms of major lashing out. Even if it doesn’t, it still annoys the crap out of everyone else.

Even before I met this person, I used to hate nice people. It’s so incredibly fake to be so very fucking nice. I’m not saying don’t be considerate. Of course, there’s nothing wrong with being understanding, courteous, and kind. But there are times when you need to say your opinions. Times where you disagree. It’s human to have your own thoughts and feelings.

Have a spine for God’s sake!

Previously? People We Choose.