As we approach the end of the school year, there are a lot of moving parts in my days. The kids’ schools have culminations or discussions around what next year looks like. They have school trips and projects that are finishing up or final projects starting up. My kids’ school doesn’t have exams or grades so that’s less of an issue for us, but compared to what they do instead, exams might be easier and certainly would take less effort from the parents’ perspective 🙂
Anyhow, so this season is about to end which means we’re going to transition into summer and then transition into a new year in the fall. I generally don’t do well with transitions because of the relatively regimented life I live. I don’t like all the readjustment I have to make. Especially since I’ve recently made a huge readjustment as I move into my new role.
But one of the things I’m learning is that life is all about transition and as I walk into the next few years, I see many big transitions in our life. My son will transition to high school in one more year. My little one will be transitioning into middle school at the same time. And then just a few years after we’ll be neck deep in college tours etc and then he will hopefully transition to college (and high school for the other.) these are big transitions. We will then have to transition into being home alone. Just writing this down makes me want to weep.
And yes, I know these are still 5-8 years away for us. But I also know how quickly time passes. I know that there will be tens of other transitions I can’t even imagine now (hopefully positive ones and not unexpected sad ones.) Life never goes according to plans. But here’s what I’m thinking as I sit here: life is passing by so quickly. I can’t remember most of the last 13 years and definitely not much before we had David. I remember many moments of course but I can’t remember the way I lived when I was 15 or 20 or 25. I can’t remember details of my daily life.
And chances are when I am 55 I won’t remember the details of this life. The stuff I fret about now, the ways I use my time, the books I read, the lunches I pack, the things that frustrate me. It will all slip away. What I will remember is how a moment felt. The moment David saw Nathaniel for the first time. The moment they both started school. The big moments and also the little ones about how they like their ice cream. How it feels to snuggle with Jake on the couch etc. My life is all the moments I live with the people I love.
As all these transitions come and go, I want to focus on those moments. I want to really be present in the moments. So much so that I can lock in the way they feel, the smells, the sounds, the way my heart swells and fills me with light inside. The deep contentment I have in those moments. I want to remember those and take them with me forever.
So as we walk into this new season of summer and adventures, this is what I want to remember. Live the moments.
On My Mind is a year-long project for 2018. You can read more about my projects for 2018 here.
Hi Karen, it is interesting that you bring up transitions, here. I have been contemplating on those, too. I have been focussing on the small ones, like parents visiting and then leaving, friends staying over for days, then leaving, vacation vs work life, and how to handle the before and after days of the “event”. The before days are usually hectic for me, trying to get a lot done, so I can enjoy the time with the people coming into my life. Lately I have been paying more attention to the energy exchange during those encounters…some make me feel high or better yet create flow, others drain me, make me feel fidgety or overwhelm me. What I have been struggling quite a bit with are the after days….transitioning back to my routine, experiencing feelings of “loss” and that inbetween state. Wondering how you feel and what helps you regain stability on an emotional and even physical level, what grounds you and what you have found to be counterproductive. I really, really enjoy your thoughtposts. You are the only person from the “scrapbooking time of my life”, that I still enjoy on a daily basis – I savour the substance and profoundness of the topics you provide here. Something significant would be missing from my life, if you stopped writing for us.