Rediscovering

A while ago I wrote about the rush of making new friends and yesterday I had the incredible joy of rediscovering someone I already knew.

There are people you meet at different points of your life and depending on how you feel, the conditions that brought you together, the kind of interactions you have, you either click or you don’t. Some times you have the impression that you might click but the opportunity doesn’t come. Other times you never even get that far. This person is in the periphery of your life for a while and you have a vague recollection of them but it never becomes more than that.

This happens to me a lot with friends of good friends. People that I see on occasions where my good friend collects all of his friends, sometimes leave me with the impression that if only I saw them more often or in different circumstances, we could be more than acquaintances.

A long time later, for some reason or another, you find yourself with this person again. Maybe you called them to ask a favor, maybe you ran into them in a street and felt in need of company, maybe they called you. That’s the moment when the occasion arises. That’s the moment you realize maybe this person isn’t the way you remember. Often times, you remember the person vaguely since the last time you saw them was at some occasion for your friend or a gathering where you both happened to attend. For some reason or another, this time you sit down and talk. Without the presence of other people or the superficial gatherings. And you realize that this person is someone you should have gotten to know a long time ago. Someone who gives you the same rush of knowing a brand new person but the comfort and familiarity of an old friend.

The best of both worlds.

The nice thing about having an old acquaintance become a new friend is that since neither of you remembers each other all that well, you don’t make any assumptions about each other. When you see an old friend after many years, he tends to assume that you’re still the same person since all the memories from the last time you hung out are often still vivid. I find that most really good friends that I’ve disconnected with are harder to bring back into my life. Even if they can move past the assumption stage, they rarely bother to get to know me again. Especially if the qualities/interests that brought us together in the first place are no longer there.

The person at the periphery of your life might have some ideas about the person they thought you were, too, but since they are vague, it’s easier to wipe them and start over without feeling a major loss. It isn’t so threatening because if you don’t click this time, it’s no big deal; you’re not destroying a past relationship.

Reconnecting with an old acquaintance is like discovering a treasure that lay before your eyes the entire time.

Previously? Pendulum.