Even though I am usually a monotony-loving person, I feel the need to shake things up lately. The problem is I don’t know in what part of my life and exactly how. I have now been keeping a relatively regular schedule of personal activities. I exercise and sketch daily. I do art journaling in the same format twice a week. A collage page once a week. My savor project. And a layout here and there for assignments. I also spend a good bit of time reading. I have sort of slacked on the journaling/meditating/strength work. And despite several varying attempts in the last few months, I haven’t really integrated anything new into my schedule.
And it’s not an issue of time.
I have more free time. Especially for things that inspire and excite me. But I feel too tired to go looking. It’s a bit ironic, I know, that I don’t have the energy to find things that might give me more energy. But here we are.
I want a super-engaging book. I want new blogs/sites that inspire me. I want some new artistic ideas to pursue. New classes to take. A new hobby. A new passion. Ways to grow. People to meet. People to really connect with. I want to feel more alive. I want to experience different things so I can feel that jolt of enthusiasm that comes with the fresh, the new.
But I don’t know how. I don’t know where to start. How to start. I don’t want to let anything go because I don’t think it will help me pick up something new. I tend to be better at making space for something once it inspires me. I have no doubt that if I felt pulled in a new direction, I won’t have trouble letting go of what’s here. I just need to feel that pull.
But I don’t know where to begin.
Any ideas?
I just cancelled a bunch of newsletters that were sucking up my time. I then did a search on things that I “might” like to explore and came up with a bunch of sites that weren’t very inspirational. I think that this process is time consuming and I know that it’s frustrating to have so much information readily available and none of it exactly what you’re looking for. One day it will just be there. I hope.
How about taking something you love, like photography, and learning something new? For example, shoot uber macro, or black and white, or textures. Learn a function of your camera that you didn’t know before. Or maybe go on regular explorations with the boys – around the neighborhood, in other neighborhoods, art galleries or public music concerts in the park, teach David how to photograph.
I’d like to suggest going out and meeting with real people – maybe people from work, other moms in your boys’ school – learn what they are about, what they are doing, try to connect with them and go on outings with. Attend a nearby University summer program, take a class in the fall on mathematics or computer science or anthropology. Attend a swimming class, start knitting, start joining a foreign speaking bookclub, cooking class, etc.
Anything in here that sounds vaguely interesting?
Have you thought about polymer clay? I liked the change to shaping something with my hands that I found relaxing, different from my normal activities. And there’s the unknown with making millefiore canes. There’s parts of the process you can control, parts that will always be a surprise – you don’t really know what the end result will look like until you slice the middle.
Hi Karen,
About six months ago, I started reading and working with “the artists way” by Julia Cameron. I never finished it, it wasn’t really right for me, but what I kept was the every-day writing. Julia suggest writing three pages every morning, the first thing you do, and I did that for some time. But since I have three small children who are very, very hungry in the morning I started writing in the evening instead. To me, the important thing is to write every day. And the great thing about the three pages is that you know exactly how much you “must” write, and when you keep going even after the first inspiration is over, things that has been hiding inside starts to show. I’ve gotten a lot of clues about what I want, need and feel because I’ve decided to always finish those pages.
If you feel like painting, I recommend “Brave intuitive painting” by Flora Bowley. It’s wonderful and I keep going back to it all the time because of her beautiful paintings and good advice. Flora makes me happy:-)
Hanna
I love your honesty and openness about these feelings. Wanting to do something new or different is who we are isn’t it. Sometimes though you think you need to change something when life isn’t going smoothly, there is a glitch somewhere which sets of a chain reaction. Just ruminating a bit…
I know it’s so easy to come here and comment and be all gushing about how wonderful and inspiring and true you are Karen but genuinely that’s whay I keep coming back and commenting. So the upshot is that I know you’ll figure it out and find something new or it will work itself out in some other way. : )
I should do a search on your blog before I suggest this – it seems like an obvious thing for you to have tried. Yoga. and if you have, maybe try a different style of yoga? there are so many variations anymore. and not a dvd or tv, but a real live class with an instructor and other students…