I’ve been experiencing a dose of the attack of blahs lately. I just don’t feel motivated to do anything. And, trust me, I have stuff to do. Maybe it’s time to shake things up. But, of course, this is exactly when I get worried about shaking things up and making decisions that come from a misplaced emotion.
But maybe it’s time.
Maybe I need to change my routine. Maybe I pick up something new and drop something old. Maybe I take a break (though I’ll admit this rarely works for me.) I’d sign up for a class and there are a few that seem to interest me but I promised myself that I wouldn’t take any new classes (though I have one starting in a week or so) until I am done really absorbing the content in the ones I’ve already taken. I took some amazing classes in the last 8 months and I really want to sit and do a lot more practice and homework before I just sign up for more and more art classes.
I won’t lie: I am a bit lost.
I still love the sketching. Though I hate the time I spend every morning choosing which one to do. It feels like such a waste do have to pick each morning. But the sketching itself, I adore. I also still like the Art Journaling but I do want to change that around a bit. Maybe have it be more painting, and more drawing, so I can combine it with the art classes that I’ve been taking. I want to work on the lettering too but that’s so so time consuming and I need so much work.
While I still love the savor project, I am not creating that many layouts anymore. I know this is a known side effect of PL. But it still feels odd. I feel like the stories I want to tell are told. I feel like I don’t have the energy and desire like I used to.
I’ve been reading a lot lately. Reading has always been my most treasured escape. It never lets me down. And I’ve been doing it more lately. Quick/easy books. Different genres. Classics. Whatever I’m in the mood for, without judgement. Saving a few favorites for the long plane ride coming soon.
It just feels like I’m biding time lately but I am not sure why. Maybe it’s cause of the upcoming trip. Or the stressful work that I know is coming upon my return. Or the pain that doesn’t seem to want to leave my body. Or summer coming. Or being burned out from the stress of the Spring. I really don’t know and I want to find a way to get out from under it. Especially because the trip, the stressful work, and the summer are all coming. Schedules will change. Routines will change. These things always throw me off, even when I am at my strongest. So I want to get ahead of the whole thing.
I just don’t know how.
Is it time to shed or to pick up new stuff? Or both? Or time to just rest and percolate but not do anything rash? Is this maybe just going to go away on its own?
I wish I knew.
I was thinking the same thing last night. Now that I’ve finished the sketchbook project, I seem to be at a loss…not sure of the direction to head. When you figure it out, could you please share in order to continue to inspire? Thanks! I knew you would.
Instead of doing anything why not savor this moment and just let it be. Savor feeling lost. Savor the insights that come from it. Savor the time to heal from spring. Savor without trying to fix it…
Sounds to me like you are just burnt. I say it’s time to veg, rest, relax and rejuvinate. Play with the boys – build legos, color, dig in the dirt, go for walks. do only what you enjoy.
I’d agree with Susan that you should try to Savor bieng lost, I’m sure you have written about about that kind of idea here before. Not to force or push or stress out but to just be.
On a different tack though I always find that if there is something big in the near future like a trip of event my mind gets blocked on that and can’t move to a time beyond that event. All concentration goes into that one thing. And if it’s a holiday then that has to be a good thing, right?
So it comes back to Savoring this feeling perhaps.
Didnt you have a post recently about Not wanting to plan ahead? I’d say
Do just that. No planning just living
Sometimes you just need to give yourself permission to feel blah. It can be exhausting to be “on” all the time. Relax, dont push so much, enjoy what you can from each day but don’t feel like a failure if it’s not as much or what you expect. It’s probably right for now.