Last night, in my Willpower class, we talked about the social aspects of willpower. Amongst other things, my teacher mentioned how people tend to not want to mention their big successes. We seem to feel like it’s socially not ok to do so. Which is extra bad, since sharing successes actually strengthens willpower and since willpower is contagious, it also helps others succeed, too.
So it’s really crucial to share and celebrate success.
the bigger the better.
I’ve always felt that it’s easier to find rough-day friends than good-day friends. There seem to be a lot of people who are willing to sit with you and commiserate. Or at least listen to you so they get get the details (and maybe feel a little better about their own life). And there are even some who truly, genuinely care and try to make you feel better.
but there are very few who can share the space with your huge successes and not make it about them. One person’s success tends to bring out other people’s jealousy and competitiveness. Weirdly, I’ve always felt the opposite way.
Seeing others succeed gives me hope.
Each time I see someone succeed, whether I know them personally or not, I feel like there’s a possibility for success. Not only do I feel happy for that person, but I just sort of feel more optimistic about the possibility of dreams coming true in general. Like that person’s success has injected hope into the world.
Eh, I am not able to explain it well. But I hope you understand what I mean. The thing is, if someone succeeds, they’re not taking my spot in the world. Their success doesn’t negate the possibility of my success. I believe this wholeheartedly. And on the contrary, I think seeing them achieve it somehow makes the goal more achievable to me. Like it can be done. Seeing someone do it makes it real. Takes it from the “dream” realm and puts it into the realm of “possibility.”
Oh I sure hope this makes sense.
Anyway, I feel like with the benefits to self as well as to community, we need to encourage people to share successes more often. Much more often.
In fact, I would so love it if you shared a recent (or not recent) success with me today. However big or small. I would love to hear it and celebrate your success with you.
TFS and letting share ! It’s a very small success for me, but it made my day. One of my pages was very recently featured on a creative blog.
Just a 2 cents idea, you’re right as long as someone succeed with her/his own work/efforts. It starts to be nasty when success comes by contacts or relations… and some people tend to get a big head, sometimes.
I succeeded to raise my wage with more then 25% !!!! (i work as a contracter and earning proven a lot more for another company). I started this discussion end of October for my new contract in Januari. Even in Februari there were still some issues, but I got it. Just keep breathing, knowing that i am invaluable for them but taking the risk they would not continue with me. I also think this is a good example for willpower. Set your goals, be aware of the risks and go for it.
Someone (I’ll try to recall who) wrote that when a person succeeds, the energy from that achievement elevates the energy around. Thereby helping others to achieve success as well. My most recent successes: academic excellence award at college at the ripe young age of 38 and exercising everyday for the last 2 months missing only 1 day (credit to you, Karen. Thank you for your tips and encouragement).
Great post!
I recently completed by World at Work certification as a Work-Life Professional. It took me a couple of years, which involved readings, course work and 4 exams, but it feels good to add this to my professional credentials.
I just successfully moderated my first focus groups.
Thanks for the lovely post.
Wonderful post I am always confused by people who feel they shouldn’t celebrate friends’ successes.
The last two weeks have been frantically busy for me I’ve completed a large complicated project and handed it in, written an annual report, draft minutes/agenda, planned a day long event, had my annual review and as of tonight feel ready for the day long meeting/workshops tomorrow. SO looking forward to Sunday afternoon crafting.
Your willpower classes continue to fascinate me.