Memory Lane

I save all my email.

I’m not exactly sure why but I have emails going back to my Freshman year in college, my first email account ever. The first email I can find is dated September 16, 1992. Every now and then, I decide to go back and read some of the thousands of messages I’ve exchanged during four years of college. Today was one of those days.

Each time I read them, I’m amazed at how many friends I’ve completely lost touch with over the years. Some, I fell out of touch with before graduation, others soon after. A few of the emails are from people I can’t even remember. Some of the people I remember, I have no idea why the emails stop so abruptly. Did something happen? Did one of us piss the other off somehow? I imagine I’d remember if someone had hurt my feelings and caused me to discontinue our conversation so I am assuming that one of us got lazy and didn’t keep up with the correspondence and the other didn’t follow up. The emails and then the friendship just tapered off.

The funny thing is, many of those emails bring me fond memories today and I am always tempted to track down and contact those individuals. This, of course, opens a can of worms: Would they remember me? Would they respond back or think I am a weirdo for contacting them after ten years? Would they get freaked out by the fact that I tracked them down?

If I think about it for long enough, I figure I have nothing to lose (besides the precious time it will take to track them down). If people are weirded out by my contacting them, they simply won’t write back and that’s that. If, on the other hand, one of them does remember me and wants to get back in touch, I get the chance to reunite with an old friend. Doesn’t sound like too much of a risk to take.

I go through this thought-process each time I read my archive of mails. I am always amazed at how many people were an important part of my life at one time and today I can’t even tell you where they live. How many people’s emails still make me smile today. How many memories are fresh on my mind. How much fun college really was. And, of course, how much I’ve changed since I came to the United States. These people are a tie to my past; they had a part in my becoming who I am. No wonder a part of me craves to find them again.