I don’t have anything pithy to say today. Except for maybe one thing: it’s always worth it to be honest, open and vulnerable. Not with everyone and not all the time but in the right amount, with the people who matter, at the appropriate times.
I find that authentic connection in nearly impossible without it and so much wonderful connection happens with it. It makes us all feel less alone in the world.
I wish more of us did it more of the time.
Yes to being honest and connecting with each other through vulnerability. It’s a superpower.
It was finally time to switch my Christmas decorations so yesterday with the help of my awesome husband, I got plants and pots and soil and created happiness.
I am working really hard lately to add small joys into my life and find ways to be present and in the moment.
Plants make me happy. Flowers. Fresh food. Sunshine.
Most of these things are so easy to achieve. And relatively affordable. So here’s to doing more of these simple things that bring happiness and joy.
I can’t get enough of the ranunculus and the season is slowly ending so I am enjoying them as much as possible.
I installed SSL certificates on my machine this weekend and a day later I realized some of the features I was using were now broken.
I spent four hours last night surfing hundreds of sites trying to debug my issue, staying up well past bedtime. Each time I thought to walk away, I figured the next two things I tried might work so I couldn’t leave.
When I finally gave up and went to sleep, I dreamt about the certificates all night. I thought about workarounds, alternative features. I did not get enough sleep.
After I woke up and forced myself to do all my exercise, I walked downstairs and started to look into it again in the middle of a meeting.
Within 20 minutes I had found and fixed the issue.
There’s a reason people tell you to ‘sleep on it.’ it’s advice I need to heed more often.
Yes to fixing my problem, yes to the power of sleep. Yes to having SSL finally.
I used to watch a lot of TV. At least 3 hours a day. I used to watch it when I was in middle school as I did my homework, in college as I studied, and long after for many many years as I worked or did art.
I used to love the Oscars. I would wake up at the crack of dawn in Turkey as a little.kid just to watch them live.
And here I am tonight sitting at home, reading a book during the Oscars. I haven’t had cable tv in three years and I don’t even know who’s nominated.
This isn’t about the Oscars, nor is it about TV. It’s about things that seemed such an ingrained part of my day to day life that I couldn’t imagine a life where I wasn’t doing them. At the time, they felt like a core part of who I am.
But now they are not. And I’ve changed. And what matters to me has changed. And it might seem like a small thing that I don’t watch TV or the Oscars but it’s an indication.that anything can change. That my life could look completely different in a few years.
And likely will.
It’s a reminder to both not hold things too tightly and to enjoy them while they are here. Because while I have no idea what tomorrow will look like, I do know it won’t look like this.
Change is the only constant.
Yes to embracing change and yes to embracing life. Don’t miss TV one little bit.
It was little boy’s 12th birthday today. One of the traditions we have here is that I’ve been waking the kids up with a cupcake and a candle on their birthday morning for years.
Little boy had been teasing me that this would be hard to uphold as I’ve been sleeping until 7 most mornings and he gets up somewhere around 6am.
So I twisted and turned all night, worried I would miss my opportunity but my husband was smarter and set the alarm for 5am. I went downstairs, grabbed the cupcake and managed to wake up the little boy.
Even though this was his second time doing a birthday under a pandemic, home with just us and even though getting presents for a twelve year old is harder than anything, this boy was as gracious as he always is. He loved his presents and he setup a video chat with his friends where they played games for 3 hours. He said it was a perfect birthday.
His attitude and resilience and generosity of spirit always lifts me up. May we all be the kind of people who lift others up.
Happy birthday little boy, I love you with all my heart and soul.
Yes to celebrating, yes to traditions and yes to little boy.
I’ve been thinking more and more about my diet lately. It’s the one area where I haven’t made as much progress as I would have liked with this project.
I think it’s because it’s not as easy to time box, constrain or do it as the others on my list. Since it’s something to not do vs something to do.
I am tired and content right now. My mind is reasonably empty which is rare and lovely. I have many things to do and many things I am worried about.
But in this very moment I am not thinking about any of them. I am here, resting, listening to a good book, feeling my sore legs, arms and toes from tonight’s workout, and feeling warm snuggled under the pile of blankets.
Grateful for the quiet and grateful to be in this present moment.
Yes to being present and yes to doing things that help me be more present.
