A few weeks ago, I mentioned how David’s school has a regular Monday morning assembly where they talk about topics that change each time. David told me last week that he was going to be the class reporter for this week’s meeting so I decided both Jake and I should go be there to support him.
Despite some early morning chaos, we both made it there and it was clear that David was very happy to have us there. Before the class reporters, the main topic was presented. This morning’s topic was about the migration of the Monarch butterflies. And she talked about several amazing aspects of the butterfly and their migration across very large distances and how the great-grandchildren know exactly where to go and when by instinct even though the original family member butterflies are no longer around the guide them.
But the story that stuck with me the most was this one:
I am going to reword but it was about a man who found a butterfly right as it was coming out of its cocoon. He watched for a while as the butterfly struggled to come out and then it looked like the butterfly was stuck. He took a pair of scissors and gently cut the opening so the butterfly could come out. And it did. It had this big body and tiny wings. After a short while the butterfly died.
The man didn’t understand that the struggle of emerging is nature’s way of forcing blood out of the butterfly’s body and into the wings. The struggle is essential for the butterfly to live. If it does not struggle to emerge from the cocoon, fluid stays in the body, and the butterfly cannot survive.
And then when I came home, I read my daily email from the Ordinary Courage class and at the end was this one question:
What would happen if you tried on the perspective that your dark places are actually strange lights waiting to help you find a new way?
What if struggle is an essential part of survival? What if you have to go through the dark to live a full and extraordinary life? What if the darkness is what you need to travel through to get to the light on the other side and to be exactly who you’re meant to be? Without the struggle the butterfly didn’t even get to live. It never developed to what it needed to be to survive. What if this is also true for us? What if by avoiding the light we’re never growing the wings we need to have?
The homework email also has this quote:
The dark does not destroy the light; it defines it. It’s our fear of the dark that casts our joy into the shadows. — Brené Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection
I am a firm believer that we need to face the dark. But I didn’t think too hard about going through the struggle before. I know there’s maturity in knowing when to walk away (this is very hard for me) and I do work hard despite struggles but I don’t always think that struggle is actually transforming me so I can be exactly who I need to be. I like that perspective.
I like idea that the struggles that seem inevitable in my life come with the gifts of making me the person I am meant to be.
After the wonderful talk, David did get to get up and represent his class and he was wonderful. He wasn’t nervous. He read clearly and enunciated well. We were both very proud of him and walked away grateful to live the kind of life that allowed us to share this experience with him.
Another one of the assignments we did in Karen’s Pathfinder class was to put together a Life List. I’d seen this on Karen’s blog before and on Mighty Girl’s too and for some reason I was never tempted to create one.
Not even during the class.
But remember how I said I am a good student and I do my homework.
So I did it.
I came up with a list of 75 items so far and they are not in any order:
- Ride a hot air balloon
- Photograph all public parks and beaches in California
- Photograph top ten beaches in the world
- Visit the Galapagos
- Visit Antarctica
- Have one of my books for sale on Amazon
- Learn Hebrew
- Learn Russian
- Rent a house in Italy for a month
- Have an art show in a gallery
- Have my art in a book
- Visit New Zealand
- Get a Ph.D.
- Learn to make stop motion movies
- Learn to grow tulips
- Make bread from scratch
- Write 1,000 thank-you letters
- Throw a big birthday party for Jake
- Take a surprise trip
- Learn to sail
- Complete a marathon
- Attend the Oscar Ceremonies
- Go back to Seychelles with Jake
- Drink 500 blends of tea
- Visit all 50 states
- Photograph the Northern Lights
- See the fjords in Norway
- Learn to change a tire by myself
- Learn about all the planets + stars
- Visit the Sagrada Familia
- Visit Easter Island
- Renovate an old house
- Hire a professional clothing (stylist?)
- Get a small tattoo
- Rent a house over a lake for a month
- Experience zero gravity
- Go on a Safari in Africa
- Attend Feast of St. Francis of Assisi (http://www.timeanddate.com/holidays/us/st-francis-assisi-feast)
- Learn to ride a bike
- Be conversational in 9 languages
- Taste 1,000 fruits
- Attend the lantern festival in Thailand
- Give a talk to more than 500 people
- Take a memorable trip with just David and me
- Take a memorable trip with just Nathaniel and me
- Visit all the National Parks in the US
- Photograph 250 species of butterflies
- Read 5 greatest novels of British, French, Russian, Italian literature
- Visit the Uffizi Gallery in Italy
- Read all of Shakespeare’s works
- Read 2,000 books to my kids
- Rent an RV
- Go to burning man
- Jump out of a plane
- Eat a super-fancy meal with Jake
- Donate one paycheck to a nonprofit
- Sell a piece of art I created
- Take 5 physics classes
- Cut my hair super-short
- Pull an all-nighter with Jake
- Work on a farm for a day
- Plant and grow a small fruit tree
- Learn to read music
- Learn to start a fire without matches
- Quilt a blanket for me
- Take the Eurorail across Europe
- Own a bookstore
- Start a nonprofit
- write a book
- learn to paint my nails and toes properly
- stay at the ten best hotels in the US
- Volunteer to hold babies at the hospital
- Read Modern Library’s top 100 books
- Read the Modern Library’s readers top 100 books
- Read Radcliffe’s top 100 books
- Drive comfortably on the freeway
I even made a list of my list items that are lists so I could check them off as I went along.
I don’t look at this as a bucket list or even a list that must get done at any moment. Just a list of fun things that bring me joy. So the idea of having them in one list makes me happy. The items might change over time. I will likely add more. I might remove some. And I might alter some. I borrowed some items from all the different lists I browsed in case any of them look familiar to you.
But for now, I consider this assignment done and I am actually glad I did it.
Do you have a list too?
I’ve had a friend email me today to ask me about how she can stay involved and learn from all the classes she’s taking. She mentioned how I take classes and still manage to do my daily projects. Coincidentally, I was already thinking this morning about the different kinds of online classes and what I like and why, etc. So I thought it might be interesting to do a post about my thoughts. Just remember that we’re all different and these are my thoughts. I will highlight things that I think are important to consider when signing up for a class and then I will tell you my preferences. If you’re different, listen to the former and ignore the latter and make your own answers instead.
These are not in order cause I am a bit too tired to do that so please know they are not in any order of importance.
Types of Classes
I’ve learned, over time, that, like in real life, there are two types of classes online: lecture-based and discussion-based. The way I differentiate the two is the amount of teacher involvement there is in the class. All classes in this day and age have at least some way for the students to comment on and participate in the class. But in some of the classes I took, the teacher rarely comments and then only to resolve technical issues, questions, etc. And in the others, the teacher was really involved, a big part of instigating and moving the discussion.
Neither type is bad. You just need to know what you prefer and what your goals for the class are. If you are taking this class to learn a new skill, for example, you might be ok just watching the videos or reading the content and not interacting too much. Whereas in a different kind of class you might really want to have some involved discussion and expect participation from the teacher.
If you know for sure that you like classes that are one way or another, I encourage you to pay attention to this when you sign up. I feel it’s important to know this ahead of time because you can adjust your expectations accordingly.
Here’s what I realized for me: I love to teach discussion-based classes because my goal is for each student to take the material and customize it into their own life. For me to be able to achieve that I need active hand-holding and encouragement and explanations on how to customize the material. Those are the classes that I feel are most impactful for me. I really encourage people to share so I can make sure the class was useful to every single student and I firmly believe we can all learn more if we share more.
However when I am the student, it depends more on why I am taking the class. If it’s deep soul work, I don’t mind doing most of that completely on my own. I will read the discussion boards but I will rarely participate. If it’s a technique class, I will only participate if I need extra help. I know this is the opposite of what I like my students to do but I’ll be honest I have very rarely had active teachers in a class and with most classes even if the discussion is lively at first, it dissipates quickly because the teacher doesn’t encourage it. (Just in my opinion.)
Discussions
For me, I have found that often times the discussions in the classes I’ve taken haven’t helped enough to be worth the time they take away from actual work. So I’d rather be journaling or doing art than being a part of the discussion. But that’s mostly been because very very few of the classes I took have active teacher participation and while I appreciated the other students a lot, there wasn’t an instance where I felt I needed the extra help. So each time I have some downtime, I’d read the discussions so I can learn/grow but I didn’t participate that much. Discussions where the teacher really encouraged sharing and learning have been helpful and in that case I do participate.
I also tend to prefer to do the work first because I like to go through it without influence from others around me. So when I am done, I feel ok participating because I feel like I’ve already done the work. I prioritize doing the assignment over any discussion almost every single time.
Motivation
I think it’s important to know why you’re taking a class. Most of the time, I sign up for a class because the content really speaks to me. I like either journaling/soulwork classes or very specific technique classes. There have been a few times I took a class cause I admired the teacher and thought taking the class would get me closer to the teacher and give me an opportunity to interact with her. In each of those instances I was disappointed. It might be my bad luck but I have learned my lesson and I never do this anymore. I sign up for content and content only.
Pace
I find, for me, classes that are fast-paced are what I like. I like to be kept on my toes and feel the pressure of work to do. This doesn’t mean there has to be dense content each week. With soul work classes I’ve found sometimes I need more time to digest or more chewable portions than the teacher gives. But for me time and again the issue is bigger if I feel the class is moving too slowly or is not meaty enough. So I try to pay attention to that when I sign up. If the class is slow, I am likely to lose interest and not complete the work.
Follow up Work
I also lose interest if there’s no clear homework and examples. I want to know the assignment and I want to know what the teacher did or thought on that assignment. So, immediately after listening/reading/watching I can do my homework. This is what motivates me so I need it and I need it to be clear. And it needs to be reasonable sized.
Timing
I don’t do well with “download and do at your pace” classes. Mostly because I feel like I can put them off forever since there’s no specific time they’re due. So I can postpone and deprioritize those over “going on right now” classes. And I often tend to do just that. I downloaded two classes in June and still haven’t finished them. That’s pretty much unheard of for me.
So pay attention to that. Do you like homework? Do you respond better to “do on your own pace” or to scheduled dates and times?
Integrating
I tend to only take classes that integrate into the life and work I am doing now. So I will use my journaling time to do the soul work class assignments. For example I am taking a class on shame-resilience right now and it involves a lot of thinking and journaling. I do mine during the morning journaling time. One or two days a week my journaling is the assignment from that week and the rest of the time it’s the free form journaling I do regularly. When I took Stephanie’s class back in January, every single day’s journaling was content from her class. I integrate the homework into my daily life.
Same goes for art journaling. When I took Christy’s classes, I used up my art journaling time to do her homework. I changed it to adapt to my own life. I even did one of my Pink Paislee blog assignments as her homework. I try to work it into my schedule as it stands.
For example at the moment I am taking three classes and here’s how I integrate them into my existing schedule:
1. Ordinary Courage: I read the classes while I exercise. I listen to the audio while I sketch. I do the homework during my journaling time.
2. Watercolor Pencils Miniclass Classes come to me once a week, I read them when I have downtime at night, I watch the videos as I exercise and I do the exercises as part of my daily sketching.
3. One Little Word This class has been a bit odd. In the beginning, I did the assignments as part of my art journaling. But then I mostly just watched the videos as I exercise and I thought about my word a lot and journaled and created some projects because of it but I haven’t actually done the album. I never really intended to do it so I am ok with that. For me this class was to keep my word at the forefront of my mind and its achieved its goal so I am happy with it.
Last month was two classes, one got integrated into my journaling time and the other to art journaling time. Next month is two classes, one will be art journaling and the other will be sketching or art journaling.
I do also take classes for a specific reason sometimes. For example I downloaded Remains of the Day a few months ago because I decided I was going to use the technique for my December Daily album. I wanted to buy that class for over a year but I didn’t want to do so unless I knew exactly what I was going to do with it so once I had the idea to use it for December Daily, I had no problem buying it because I knew I could put it into use.
I hope this makes sense. There isn’t one class in the twenty-one classes I have on my list this year that doesn’t integrate into either sketching, journaling or art journaling. So I think that’s why I am able to keep up with my classes. If my goal was to do a layout a day for example, I could take a sketch class that would give me daily sketches and I could easily integrate that into my daily layout time.
I think about my daily schedule and personal goals when I sign up for a class now. Is there a way I will immediately be able to put this class into use? If so, I look at the other points about pacing, homework, teacher participation and then if I am still happy, I sign up. If not, I pass. I still get disappointed sometimes but it’s getting rarer and rarer.
If you have any more questions please don’t hesitate to ask, as long as you remember it’s just my opinion, I am always happy to share it.
I mentioned some of the work I did in Karen’s Pathfinder class a few weeks ago. I’ve been meaning to come back and tell you more about some of the other things we did.
One of the assignments was to create a vision board. She talks about her process in this post. The idea was to create a similar one in the class. On canvas, etc.
I will admit that I resisted doing this assignment. I don’t have any magazines. Literally, not one. And last time I went through magazines to tear images (for Melody Ross’ class) I didn’t find it enjoyable. I don’t like to make canvases because I have nowhere to put them in my house. I don’t want to create more clutter. I don’t like dealing with glue if I can avoid it (I know this is crazy.) I didn’t have any ideas. Honestly, I just did not want to do this.
But because I am one of those students who has to do all the homework assigned, I couldn’t let it go. I borrowed magazines from neighbors. I thought about it for a few days. I even tore a few images. I just couldn’t get into it no matter what. So then, I tried to tell myself it was ok not to do it.
But I just couldn’t let it go without at least trying.
I finally decided to try a different route. I opened up my inspiration board on pinterest. And picked images and sayings that spoke to me. Since these were images I’d already pinned I knew that they were all meaningful to me so I couldn’t go wrong.
I saved them all on my computer and then opened them in photoshop to create a collage:
Once I was done, it made me really really happy. I also added my word right on the butterfly. And I was done.
I picked images that are inspirational, peaceful, and happy for me. Mental notes I try to remember. There are a lot of images of nature because nature makes me happy. Creates a wide sense of peace in me. I also chose books, music, birds, butterflies. Color. Flowers. Exercise. And some good messages about being in the present moment and appreciating myself. I love all of these images and having them together is really powerful for me.
So once I was done, I printed it out and taped it into my current notebook (more on this notebook coming soon).
Now, I get to look at it anytime I want. It didn’t involve any magazines, cutting, or modge podge but I still did my own version of a vision board.
And it was so worth it.
If you’ve never done this exercise, I recommend it. I am glad that the good student in me didn’t give up. If you’ve done it, I’d love to see your vision board so please do leave me a comment with it.
As part of my sketching each morning, I’ve begun to collect images from some of my favorite poems. This got me thinking about poems I like. I’ve always wished I understood and knew more poetry but my education in that area is poor.
Here are some of the poems I love:
One Art by Elizabeth Bishop
The Red Wheelbarrow by William Carlos Williams
This Is Just to Say by William Carlos Williams
Nothing Gold Can Stay by Robert Frost
The Secret Sits by Robert Frost
Fire and Ice by Robert Frost
Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening by Robert Frost
Funeral Blues by W. H. Auden
i carry your heart with me by e. e. cummings
I love pretty much anything by Shel Silverstein and I have a little book of poems by Jean Little which I cherish and adore.
I used to love The Road Not Taken by Frost, too but we recently read about this poem and it changed the whole meaning for me so I am not sure where I stand with it at this point.
What about you? do you have poems you love? I’d love to discover new ones. One of these days I should take a class on poetry just so I can expand my knowledge.
Yesterday, I received a really nice email about how much I get done and some questions about any tips I might have so I thought it might be a good idea to share some of my thoughts and ideas with all of you. Please know that this is what works for me and your mileage might vary.
First of all, there are many many many things I don’t get done. Many! I don’t cook or clean or do most of the household chores many people do. My kids do not have after-school activities and rarely go on playdates. My days are pretty similar to each other and allow for consistency. Even though I work at home, I have quite a demanding full-time job so I don’t commit to anything during work-hours. My kids know and understand that even though I am around, during the day my job takes priority and most of the time they are respectful of that and play independently. But I also get to spend a lot of time with my kids during the day.
One of the things I have is a relatively strict and consistent schedule. This changes with each school year and during the summer. But here’s my schedule at the moment:
5:30-6:00am – wake up and immediately exercise (I check email while I exercise)
6:00-6:30am – done with exercise, shower, write in journal
6:30-7:00am – start sketching
7:00-7:25am – prepare lunches, breakfast, wake up kids, read to David while he eats
7:25-7:45am – continue sketching
7:45am-8:30am – drive kids to school
8:30-9:00am – finish sketching, take photo of sketch
9am-5:30pm – work, eat lunch, walk to pickup Nathaniel from school, make lunch for him, etc.
5:30-6:30pm – kids bedtime routine and write blog post
6:30-7:30pm – write in weeklong art journal then start daily art journal page (sometimes David reads to me while I do art.)
7:30-8:00 or so – kids are down, finish off art journal page. if I have a layout due, I work on that instead of art journal page
8:00-10:00pm – hang out with hubby, read book, do a layout, watch TV whatever. This is extra time for me to do whatever I want.
10pm – go to bed.
Some of these change a bit. Like sometimes the blogging takes longer or I finish the sketch more quickly, etc. But I always exercise first thing and I rarely ever go to bed past 10. I often sleep around 9:30 to try to get a full 8 hours of sleep. I wake up at least once a night and take David to the bathroom. I am not a morning person. I changed my schedule because I found that most nights I am too tired to motivate myself. By the end of the day I feel worn out and I am more likely to sit in front of the TV rather than sketch. Whereas if I woke up early, while it was unpleasant, there was no one to bother me or to worry about. I could do my stuff, start my day on the right foot and by the time the household woke up I felt like I already did a few wonderful things for myself that day.
so there you have it. On the weekends, it’s pretty similar except I wake up around 7am and go to bed around 11. Instead of working, I will do more art, layouts, and hang out with my family.
Since I was asked for some tips, here is what I came up with that works for me. They are not in order:
1. Set a schedule: I find that having something scheduled for a particular time always works for me. I am not a roll-with-it kind of girl so having something on my schedule makes it more real and tangible and often means I get it done. It also gives my activity validation and value.
2. Schedule short bursts of time: I try to not have any activity that needs more than 30 mins. My exercise is 20 minutes, journaling is around 20 mins and reading to David is the same. The sketching takes a bit longer but I break it up so I draw for 20 mins and color for 20 mins and write for 10 mins so I can do them throughout the day if needed. I reserve time consuming activities for the end of the day so I don’t feel like I used up a lot of my day and have to stress. I feel trying to find a 30-minute slot in your day feels a lot less overwhelming than finding a 2-hour slot. If you take 15 minutes a day to do art journaling, it’s still MUCH better than no time. And 15 minutes a day adds up to almost 2 hours a week. Whereas if you don’t let yourself do it unless you have a 2-hour block, you might not art journal for weeks. There are many things you can do in a 15minute slot, if this is stressing you out, let me know and I’ll make a post with ideas.
3. Batch up a few activities to do during your “you time:” I do most of my personal goals during two slots in the day. 5:30am-7:30am and 6:30pm-8pm. That’s 3.5 hours during which I don’t have work and my kids are sleeping. I specifically wake up before my kids wake up to use some quiet time to get my personal goals done. I am NOT a morning person but I know that starting my day like this is incredibly peaceful for me so I do it. Most of us have some down time during the day. Maybe it’s your lunch hour. Try to divide the hour into two 30 minute slots and do two things. You can read for 30minutes and art journal for 30 minutes. You can eat while you read. I find that doing a few things in a row helps me more than doing one thing for a long period.
4. Eat the frog: The concept of eating the frog means doing an important to-do list item that you’re dreading. For me, this is the exercise. I dread it and it’s the most important thing I do for myself everyday. So I get up and I do it first thing. This means if the rest of my day goes downhill and my schedule goes out the window, I still did the most important thing. I do it well before work hours and well before my kids wake up so the chances of something interfering with it are low. Eating the frog means I start my day with a big win.
5. Just do it: Stop making excuses. Stop saying you don’t have the time. I have never ever met someone who doesn’t have 15 free minutes in their day. You can draw 15 minutes a day or read or art journal or learn something new a bit at a time. When you just sit and do it, you suddenly discover you have a lot more time than you think you do. If you get in the habit of not making excuses, you end up getting more done and that motivates you to do even more. It’s a positive cycle to be in so you just have to kickstart it by sitting at a table and doing something for 15 minutes.
6. Make the Time: Similarly to the previous one. There will never be time in your day unless you make it. Look for the holes. Wake up earlier. Go to bed later. Eat lunch in half the time. Clean a little bit less. Whatever it takes. If what you want to do is important to you, create the time. Steal it away from something else. You matter and what you want to do matters so create time however you need to.
7. Talk to your family/friends: If you have friends or family, husband, kids who depend on you, talk to them. Tell them why it’s important for you to take this time for yourself. Why it matters. My kids know that even if they wake up before 7am, it’s mommy’s quiet time and they play quietly on their own while I do my journaling or sketching. Seeing me value this time for myself shows them that it matters to me so they learn to respect it, too. Respect and value starts with you. If you’re always willing to postpone activities that bring you joy so someone else can have what they want, you’re telling them your personal joy doesn’t matter as much. I think there needs to be a balance and mutual respect. Some kids are too young to understand but most aren’t. In my opinion, of course.
8. Find What motivates you: I am motivated by schedules. I rarely feel in the mood to do something. Inertia is very strong for me. So Getting up to sit at my table and starting the activity motivates me more than anything else. So I just do it cause my schedule says I have to. And once I start I am in the zone and enjoy it. But getting started only happens because it’s on my schedule. Classes motivate me, too. I am a good student and take homework seriously. So I take a lot of classes because I know it helps me journal and do art. For some people it’s having a buddy. An exercise buddy, an art buddy etc. For others it’s having a personal, quiet space. Or really loud music. Whatever it is for you, figure it out and use it to your advantage. Another thing that helps me is being prepared. I generally have an idea of my sketch subject the night before so when I sit to sketch, I am not looking for ideas. I don’t do this for art journaling or layouts but I do it regularly for sketching.
9. Track Progress: For me, this does wonders. I track my exercise with the nike+ and fitbit. I track my sketches and art journaling by posting them here weekly. I have daily tasks lists with all my recurring activities so I make sure to cross them off each day. Seeing progress really helps me so I do it. I track books that David and I read, too. And we both love looking at the little book full of all the cards we made with each book we read. It’s very rewarding and I recommend it.
10. Create Rewards and Celebrate: This may sound touchy-feely but rewards are a big part of self-motivation. I reward my exercise by buying a piece of clothing each month. I buy art supplies or sign up for online classes regularly. I use income from my classes or designer work to buy supplies or classes so I am rewarding myself for working hard and keeping an art practice. Take the time to celebrate and congratulate yourself. Being disciplined is hard. But truly worthwhile.
Well this is really really long, I hope it’s helpful. Remember that it’s just what works for me. I prioritize these things over other things because this is what matters to me. Find out what matters to you. And if art journaling doesn’t matter enough to you to create time over it, do not chastise yourself. I think a big part of this is owning up to what you like and what you don’t. Earlier this month, I had allotted 15 minutes of my day to writing a book. But I quickly realized I never enjoyed that time and even though I would love having written a book, I didn’t like actually writing it. So I walked away from it. During this you-time, don’t try to do what you think you should. Do only the things you love and things that truly make you feel good.
Remember that your time is super-precious and runs out each and every day. So use it however it makes you feel most fulfilled.
Thank you for your comments yesterday. I had a much better day today. Sleep always helps me get some perspective, too.
If you’ve been following my blog for any time, you know I love taking (and teaching) online classes. I had decided to focus on taking more this year and I thought it would be good to keep a list of all the classes I’ve taken this year so far. My plan is to add to this so I know what I took when. I will only tell you the general area of the class and refrain from giving too much of my opinion because each person experiences a class differently and I think it’s best for you to make your own decisions on what works for you. If you have specific questions, leave me a comment and I will answer truthfully as long as you realize that I only have my own personal experience and perspective.
With that here’s what I’ve taken (and have already signed up for) so far in 2011:
January
Stretching Within with Misty Mawn (mixed media, drawing, collage, journaling and photography)
Shifting Ground with Stephanie Lee (journaling, personal-growth)
One Little Word with Ali Edwards (scrapbooking, journaling, photography)
Soul Restoration I with Melody Ross (personal-growth, journaling, art journaling)
February
Sketchbook Delight with Alisa Burke (sketching)
Recycled Journal Pages by Pam Carriker (art journaling)
She Art by Christy Tomlinson (art journaling, mixed media)
I taught classes through February to mid-April so I didn’t take anything then.
May
She Had Three Hearts by Christy Tomlinson (art journaling)
June
Watercolor Bliss by Alisa Burke (sketching and watercolor)
Soul Restoration II by Melody Ross (personal-growth, journaling, art journaling)
Pan Pastel 101 & 102 by Donna Downey (mixed media, art journaling)
Remains of the Day by Mary Ann Moss (scrapbooking, art journaling)
July
21 Secrets by Dirty Footprints Studio (art journaling, mixed media)
August
Creative Color: Art Redefined by Christy Tomlinson (art journaling, mixed media)
Art Journaling by Dina Wakley (art journaling, mixed media)
September
Uber Media: Pan Pastels by Nathalie Kalbach (mixed media, art journaling, scrapbooking)
The Pathfinder by Karen Walrond (personal-growth, journaling)
October
Ordinary Courage by Brene Brown and Jen Lemen (personal-growth, journaling)
Watercolor Pencils Miniclass by Cathy Johnson (sketching, watercolor)
November
She Art 2 by Christy Tomlinson (art journaling, mixed media, sewing?)
letterLAB by Lori Vliegen (calligraphy, art journaling)
That’s it so far. I will be teaching a class in December and likely doing December Daily so I don’t think I will be taking anything then but you never know!
I’ve learned that my favorite classes are either technique-based art journaling or personal growth so I tend to favor those. If you have any questions about any of these feel free to ask. Also I keep track of online classes I find interesting on a pinterest board so you might be able to find a few other ideas there, too.
I’ve started reading Karen’s blog a little over a year ago. I don’t remember how I found it. Some of the other blogs I read linked to it, I’m sure, and once I landed there, I stayed. Karen’s voice speaks to me and I often enjoy her images and her thoughts. I bought her book last Christmas and absolutely loved it.
When she announced that she was going to teach a 5-week course on creating your own beautifully different life. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to sign up. I feel like I like my life as it is right now. I am not saying it’s perfect or even my ideal but I feel content right now and I’ve taken a few courses in the last few years on similar areas which left me a bit jaded in these types of courses. I don’t have big dreams right now. I feel like I’ve come a long distance and I am on sort of a pause where I am just trying to enjoy where I am instead of aiming for other places.
Anyway.
But I like Karen. I like her way of approaching things. Her point of view. And I like taking classes. I really like taking classes. So I signed up. I couldn’t help myself. As soon as I paid for it, I was flooded with hesitation. Did I really want to take this class? Was it worth it? What was I looking for?
The questions went on and on but, alas, it was too late. I’d signed up. So I just patiently waited until the lessons started coming. The first week was last week and the focus was on “introspection” which is something I love so I was looking forward to it.
One of the first things Karen had us do is the process she outlines in this blog post. She had us make a list of everything we love to do. Everything. I must admit this was already hard for me. I thought it was a bit odd. And didn’t see the point.
But I am a good student, so I did my homework. I wrote four pages of things I loved (in retrospect I didn’t read carefully and wrote some things I loved (not doing but just things like chocolate.) and I think it would have been better for me to make sure they were all actions.) and I still didn’t see the point.
Then she made us write why we loved them. This is where the magic begins. I put off this assignment for a bit cause it came on a day when I was deliriously busy and I wanted to be able to take my time. When I finally sat to do it, I quickly got amazed. There were certain things on the list that I’d loved to do forever, like reading, so I hadn’t thought a lot about why I loved it. So I took a long time thinking about it.
The interesting thing is that I’ve loved reading ever since I learned to read. As a little girl, it was my way of escaping a world where I felt like I didn’t belong. As I grew older, it was a way to learn and practice a language that wasn’t my mother tongue. And then it was about the stories. And then the people. Now it’s about seeing how other people see the world. Learning about different worlds, people, ways of looking at things. So the activity is the same, reading, but the “why” of my love for it has changed over time and it was great to step back and think about it.
Just like thinking about why I like to blog, why I like to knit, take photos, etc. I was especially stumped at some of the nature-related items on my list. I love sinking my toes in the sand. I love feeling the waves wash over my legs. I love to watch the sun set or come up. I love taking a walk in the woods. I love watching the ocean. I kept thinking about why I love these things. Nature makes me feel calm, content, peaceful. I feel awed by it. I don’t just like nature, I like immenseness of it. I love the super-tall red wood trees; I love the endless ocean. I love feeling small and feeling like my problems are insignificant in the grand scheme of our world. (I made a piece of art about this many years ago.) So I kept thinking why did I love nature. And I finally decided it was because I love the feeling of being connected to something bigger than I am. Same reason I love volunteering or teaching. Diving.
After we’re done filling the why’s, Karen asks us to look for patterns. I’m a computer programmer; I like patterns. I love looking for patterns. The idea was to come up with verbs that might define the kinds of things that light you up. As with most pithy things, it seems so simple in retrospect, my words came out to be: learn, create, connect.
These words shouldn’t be surprising to anyone who reads my blog.
I was so fascinated by this that I asked Jake to make a list, too, and since it was my birthday yesterday, he indulged me. My goal was to see what things might come up in both of our lists. Even if he and I loved it for different things, it would be great to see what we both loved to do.
What came out was even more fascinating to me. Jake and I had similar things of course. And we even shared some of the same words. But it was in different ways.
For example, he and I both love learning. But we go about it so differently. I love to learn by watching others do it, taking classes, reading books, etc. He loves to learn by reading/listening and then thinking about it deeply so he can understand it from the ground up. He likes to learn by building, experimenting, tinkering, trying. By doing. So by the end, he generally has a much deeper understanding of things than I do. I generally learn a bit and then do, do, do. I might not fully know what I am doing. But a few months down the line, I will. I learn by doing, too, but not the way he does. This is the kind of stuff that fascinates me. Knowing how I work. Knowing how others work. Seeing the subtle differences. Acknowledging them and paying attention to them.
I think paying attention to these details is what makes relationships work better. The awareness allows us to make room for the possibility and understanding that others don’t work the way we do. And our way is no more right than theirs. So we can respect that they work their way.
Sorry, I know this is long. But I have so much more I want to write. About how knowing these words has already helped me a tremendous amount and I haven’t even finished going through my whole love list yet. I might even do the whole thing over and make sure to focus on verbs. But I still feel pretty confident that some form of learn, create and connect will end up being my words. And I have specific examples of what kind of learning, creating and connecting I like to do.
And knowing them allows me to seek more opportunities doing all three of these things. (Which was Karen’s point, of course.)
Sorry if this is all rambling a bit. I wanted to get some of my thoughts down before weeks pass and I forget. Part of the connecting (which for me is also sharing and connecting with my own inner thoughts, hence writing them here.)
All this from the first week of a class I wasn’t even sure I wanted to take.
Not bad, eh?
If I taught a class on setting and achieving goals would you be interested in taking that? It would be taught in a private blog setup by me, likely with daily posts. It would not be specific to scrapbooking or even art or any particular field. It would apply to any and all areas of your life.
Is this something you’d be interested in? If you’d let me know either way in the comments or by emailing me (karen AT karenika DOT com) I would very much appreciate it.
Also if you are interested, here are four other things I would like to know?
1. When would be an ok time for you to take the course. As in would mid/end of May be ok? How about summer? Or fall?
2. How long would you like it to be 2-3-4 weeks?
3. How much would you think is a comfortable price for you for such a class?
4. Is there any particular content in that area you’d want to make sure I cover.
Feel free to post answers to as many as you feel comfortable. Please don’t take it personally if I end up not doing what you might prefer. I am just trying to collect information and do the very best I can.
I’ve been thinking a lot lately again and like before I originally thought these would end up as individual posts but I can’t seem to find the time (or more like motivation) to sit and write it all out so I am going to try this quicker version instead.
Here are part 1, part 2 and part 3.
14. Looking for the Quick Fix. This, too, has been on my mind a lot lately. We seem to have grown into a society of people looking for the quick fix. Learn Japanese in 24 hours. Become a master programmer in a week. Blah blah. These are not possible goals. Things take time. Dedication. Work. Becoming a master takes time. To me it’s a contradiction in terms. Trust me, I’d love to wake up tomorrow morning and be a master artist. Someone who can draw beautifully. But it’s not going to happen. Most of the people you see as “overnight” successes are people who are obsessively putting time and effort into their passion. Painting night and day. Writing for hours on end. Drawing again and again. When I study a new language I study for about 4-5 hours a day for months! Months. Gladwell famously mentions in his Outliers book that you need to dedicate 10,000 hours to something to master it. Break that down. An hour a day would get you 365 hours (ok 366 on leap years.) at that rate, you’d reach 10,000 in 27 years. If you do two hours a day, it’s still going to take 13.5 years. And when was the last time you put in two hours a day, every single day, into anything? I am a big proponent of “what you pay attention to blossoms.” And attention = time in our society. There are many things that are faster today. Like finding the meaning of a word or the original book a movie is based on, etc. You can google just about anything. But you still can’t shortcut life. If you want to be a good artist, writer, sports player, musician, programmer, physicist, you name it, you need to put in the time and the effort. Not just empty time either. Meaningful, purposeful time. Studying it, observing, growing, learning. I truly believe that. When I get frustrated with my sketches and how elementary they look, I remind myself I’ve put in maybe 10-20 hours so far. That’s 0.2% of 10,000. I’ve got a long way to go. Sometimes I need more perspective to bring me back to reality. It’s always about perspective. It also reminds me that where I spend my time matters. Very much.
15. Internet and blogs have brought real value into my life. I know it’s fashionable to bash blogs as a waste of time People who’ve inspired me despite not knowing them or ever having met them in person. There are people out there who share and I read and I get inspired to try things in my own life. Sometimes I succeed and discover something I never knew before or find a new passion. Sometimes it doesn’t work out but I am still thankful for having tried. But there are people who’ve tangibly changed my life. Heather is the reason I bought my first digital SLR. It prompted Jake to teach me more about photography. The camera led me to my first business. It brought on a passion I didn’t even know I had. I’d liked taking photos before but nothing like this. I learned so much about photography. Discovered a true love. I might or might not scrapbook my whole life but I will always take photos. It’s my passion and I put the hours into it, but Heather was the person who opened that world to me. She triggered it. Just by being herself. I am so grateful. Ali has inspired me in many ways but the most significant one is December Daily. Because of that album, I now always plan a million activities for my family during December. It’s become a tradition and something we all cherish so much. We owe so many of our adventures to this. So many amazing memories we will now have forever. December Daily is what triggered that for me. Ali’s pages and point of view also helped me look more closely at the everyday moments in my life. Tell our ordinary stories. This, too, has changed my life. It’s like getting to look back up on the “good old days” while they are still happening. It increases awareness, gratitude, and joy. Cathy, too, has changed my life. She is the one who triggered my “getting healthy” goal this year. Yes I am doing all the work but the trigger matters. The Nike+ made a tangible difference for me and I read about that in Cathy’s blog. Seeing her transform gave me hope. And now I have lost over 24 lbs in six months and I am the smallest size I’ve ever been in my life. More significantly I exercise every single day. With the exception of a brief hour with Heather, I’ve never met these people. We don’t regularly email or chat. But they have tangibly changed my life. If that’s not real value, I don’t know what is.
16. Self-conversation matters. I recently finished Christy’s amazing she art class and it made me realize something. As I watched her paint and stamp, I heard her say “oh that’s cute” or “i love that” often. I noticed that even if she made a mistake, she wouldn’t beat herself up about it. She’d just work with it, around it, or try to fix it. She was easy on herself. She enjoyed the process and was generally happy. When I create art, that’s not how it goes for me. I generally beat myself up a million times. I feel like I’ve ruined the piece a good ten times. I have to stop myself from stopping and chucking it away. I feel like it’s all just proof that I suck at this. It’s like I am waiting all along to be proven right that I am no good. Isn’t that terrible? Watching her made me realize that I’ve noticed others be positive, too. People enjoy the process. They build themselves up and see possibilities. I need to focus on that. Focus on patting myself in the back, cheering myself on. Being more positive. Feeling like I can do this. And giving myself permission to learn. To explore. I talked a lot about the “little girl” in my Finding Your Way class at BPC. The little one that lives inside each of us and the one who’s full of energy and hope and creativity and ideas. The one where most of the good stuff comes from. I feel like when it comes to art and mixed media I squash mine a lot and often. I am not kind to her. I need to work on this.
and there we are. that’s what’s on my mind lately.
I’ve been thinking a lot lately again and like before I originally thought these would end up as individual posts but I can’t seem to find the time (or more like motivation) to sit and write it all out so I am going to try this quicker version instead.
Here are part 1 and part 2.
9. My kids can teach me so much. I’ve noticed a lot of things my kids do that I can learn from. For example, my little boy is very persistent. When he doesn’t know how to do something, he keeps trying and trying and trying until he gets it. More significantly, he doesn’t beat himself up each time he fails. He does sit there and bash himself when he stumbles and falls. He might cry if it hurt, but he doesn’t act like “I can’t believe i fell again! I am such a moron.” He gets up and runs again. And again. He also eats what he loves first. He doesn’t save it for last like I often did. I’ve learned over the years that if I save my favorites to last, I end up eating everything even if I am full, which is not good. My kids are not afraid to ask for help. They do like to do some things by themselves but they also feel comfortable asking for help. They don’t worry about looking stupid or being judged. They just know they can get it done better or faster or more correctly so they ask for help. They know it’s a part of the learning and growing process. They communicate. Often and clearly. They tell me what they are thinking and they are persistent I listen. They also teach me to have more fun. They spend their time doing what they love. If something starts to get boring, they move on and do something else. I tend to spend a lot of my free time doing things I’ve told myself I should do. There’s balance here of course but I do need to spend more time enjoying the moments. There’s no saying how life will turn out, might as well have a bit more fun while I can.
10. The Switch. I’ve learned, over time, that I have a switch inside. I tend to be really nice and kind to most people. I assume the best of them etc. etc. I’ve had many people be mean to me over the years. But I don’t mind the obvious mean people. What I do mind is people who are subtly mean. Who start taking advantage of me. Who end up being two-faced and unkind. I am not sure how and why it happens, but I tend to assume the best of a person until one day they do something (often something seemingly small) that makes me realize how they’ve really not been nice all along and sort of been taking advantage of me little bit at a time. Or just that they are not actually nice. And then the switch flips and I can never see this person in the same light again. I am hurt and broken inside and there’s almost nothing they can do to get me out of that bad place. It takes a long time to get there but once I am there, it’s like I can’t get out. Now everything that comes from this person is filtered through my negative opinions of him/her and I assume the worst and I assume unkindness. I think both are flawed. No one is nice all the time and no one is mean all the time. People are human. I think when I look up to someone, I often make them bigger than they are. They are almost sure to fail me. So I do need to watch for that. But I also need to pay more attention so before it even comes to the switch point, I can reach out and communicate or slowly distance myself so that the switch never comes on. This way, I still have a chance to cool down and see things without positive or negative filters.
11. Looking for the Good. I know I’ve talked about this before. But I always come back to it. Especially when thinking about #10 above. I have a way of getting to that bad place. Thinking everyone hates me. Hating myself. Crushing myself with my own judgements and words. Reading into everything everywhere and making it about me and about how I am failing at things, failing the people I love. I can go on and on. I’ve learned over time that most of this is a reflection of how I feel about myself. My default place is the insecure place where I need affirmation and support. However, there are times I feel in my element. I feel strong. Comfortable. Then I see things more positively. So I am making a point of looking for the good lately. I am trying to remind myself. Just like the practice of gratitude, looking for good in your life, in people’s words and actions changes my minutes, hours, days and life. If I feel lost, I try to play with my kids who, I am so happy to say, are joyful little boys. They remind me that life is beautiful. They laugh at the sound of music and make silly faces. So I am going to make a point of looking for the good. Choosing joy. I seem to need regular reminders. But that’s ok. I will remind myself again and again for as long as it takes. Because this is important.
12. Rest and Restoration is Important. I am not good at slowing down. I like being busy. It makes me happier, more productive, more fulfilled, etc. But I also am learning to appreciate the value of rest. For me, it’s not as related to how much I did as much as it is about my stress. I could do a lot of stuff but not feel stressed out and so I don’t need rest. But if I do something that really stresses me out, has me on an edge for days, I invariably need to rest. I need to restore all that energy I spent. I need to go back to my place of happy, relaxed comfort zone. If that means I lie on the couch and read that’s ok. The thing I do often is that I beat myself up for not doing the items on my todo list during these times and then I don’t do them anyway. I just make myself feel bad. So instead of doing something I might enjoy, I punish myself and tell myself that if I am not doing this item on my todo list, I should not get to do this other fun thing. Instead I do nothing. I waste the time altogether, whining and feeling tired. What a waste. I’ve decided that during these times, I will give myseld permission to just do something I love. It might be reading for a whole day or just sitting and playing legos with my sons. It might be spending the whole day on pinterest. It doesn’t matter what it is as long as I am choosing it and I am not beating myself up for it. Anything that helps me rest and restore the energy is ok to do. Some of my best ideas come when I let go and relax fully (just like some of my best ideas come when I am working hard. Extreme situations seem to bring forth creativity for me.) So here’s to letting myself rest without scolding myself.
13. Passing Judgement. I’ve been thinking a lot about this lately. I wonder why we’re do wired to pass judgement. Where does that come from? How does that protect us? How does it help you to bring someone else down? Why are people mean? I know there are times people are jealous and let that seep out with mean comments. But why? How does it make me feel better to say something mean to you? If I have no money and can’t go on vacation, then I see that you’re going to Hawaii and I say something like “It must be nice to be able to go to Hawaii.” That made you feel terrible but how did it help me? Do I get some kind of a physical release or a happiness boost from having torn you down? I truly don’t get it. Genuinely. I can understand the instinct behind jealousy. I can understand the curiosity and wanting to know about someone else’s drama. What I don’t understand is how making them feel bad actually help you feel good. I have personally experienced how helping someone can make you feel good. It can lift you up. Does hurting someone also lift you up? For me, it always makes me feel worse. Like a crappy person. And now I’ve made them and me feel bad. What’s the point of that? I am not being flippant here. I swear I don’t get it. I would love some explanation on this one. I am not saying I am always good but I do try not to deliberately break people. I genuinely feel good for others when they reach their dreams and goals. I don’t think their success makes mine any less likely. On the contrary, I now see it as a reachable dream. Sure I feel jealous sometimes, frustrated, wonder why not me, etc etc. I’m human. But I don’t think that making that other person feel bad will actually ever help me feel better.
there you go. a bit of what’s on my mind. more coming next week.
Several people have asked what I thought about the Soul Restoration class and instead of writing the same stuff again and again, I thought I’d post it here. Remember that these are just my personal thoughts.
I’ll admit that I wasn’t sure I needed to take this class. For the first time in many many years, I feel like my soul is in better shape than it’s ever been, so I wasn’t sure what it would do for me. I mean, I knew I could always use more work but I didn’t feel like I needed it. Not like sketching and painting and drawing, all of which were calling to me with more urgency. But I’ve been reading Melody’s blog for a long time and the way she writes really speaks to me strongly. It moves me and makes me feel empowered and inspired so I knew I was going to miss out if I didn’t try. Since I have little kids, getting away to go to Brave Girl Camp wasn’t an option for me. So when this opportunity presented itself, I had to take the plunge. I was taking 4 other classes at the same time and this was the one I thought I was least likely to learn “new things” in.
I could not have been more wrong.
I would have to say this is easily one of the best classes I have ever taken. Ever. One of the ones I learned the most in and grew the most in. I am the kind of person who pays attention. I would say I am aware. I listen to myself. I watch and observe and try to learn and grow. And, still, I learned so very much about myself in this class, it’s almost impossible to explain how much. I had revelation after revelation.
Here are some basic details about the class: It’s 6 weeks long (though we had a bonus 7th week) and each week is several videos. Each video is 5-15 minutes but there might be 4 to 8 for each lesson. There are downloadables too but you really need to be able to watch the videos, the content is in the videos. So you need reliable and good internet access. Then, each week, there are projects. You can make them as artsy as you want or not at all. There also are journaling prompts each week. Around 15 or so each week. You are strongly encouraged to journal the ones that speak to you. You are also encouraged to make something called truth cards. (I have only made one of these so far but it’s in my list for April or May and I will definitely make them because I know it will be very very powerful.) There are many many many technique videos, too. On art, journaling, etc. There’s also a community where you can share, listen, support, ask questions, etc. That’s the basics.
I will admit that I didn’t participate a lot in the community. I had limited time and decided early on it would be easy to sink it all into the community and not do any of the work but I wanted to do the work, so I chose that. Other than that, though, I did everything. I watched the videos when they went up (I excitedly awaited each one to be honest.) I did a lot of journaling. I did all the art. I used one journal to do everything in and here’s what it looks like now.
I think the single biggest thing that helped me was the journaling. The art was powerful, too but not as much as the journaling. The journaling made me keep it real. Dig deep. Art was also like that. Just not as deep. But maybe that was because I did the journaling first each time.
Here are all my posts about the class so you can see how much I grew and learned each week:
Week 1 – Soul House
Week 1 – TruthTeller (It looks like I never posted this one. The art is below.
Week 2 – My Timeline
Week 3 – The Two Karens
Week 4 – She Did it Anyway
Week 5 – The Good and the Bad
Week 6 – Where the Peace Is
Week 6 – Promises
Week 6 – No More and Focus On
Week 7 – Daily Soulwork
Here’s the Truthteller page:
I should have written about that one for a long while, too. Apologies.
What made this class great was that if you actually sit and did the work, it was impossible not to learn and grow. It’s genuine, it works. I will admit that I don’t have anything truly horrible that is going on or went on in my life. I cannot speak for how hard it is to handle all this inward looking if you have. If you need real help, you should be seeking it with a professional of course. But if, like me, you like to be inward looking, more aware, and want to free your soul, this is the class for you. You have to commit to doing the work, though. Really really doing it.
I genuinely, deeply, truly recommend it. And I am so thankful that Melody and Kathy decided to finally do it online. I knew it would be truly transformative and, for me, it really was.
If you have any questions, feel free to ask in the comments, I will be detailed and truthful in my responses as long as you promise to remember these are just my personal opinions and your experience, of course, might end up being different.
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projects for twenty twenty-four
projects for twenty twenty-three
projects for twenty twenty-two
projects for twenty twenty-one
projects for twenty nineteen
projects for twenty eighteen
projects from twenty seventeen
monthly projects from previous years
some of my previous projects
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