I have a lot of photos today and I have a melting down baby and a long list of todos tonight so I am going to keep the words short and let the photos speak for themselves. 52 Things is ideally going to come some time today or possibly tomorrow, too.
This morning, the kids went under the curtains and looked out the window to the backyard. Watching the birds and squirrels.
I love watching them.
Or maybe I just love them.
In the afternoon, we went to the park by our house. Nathaniel watched his brother a lot and he must have loved that cause he gave him a hug all on his own.
Here’s Mr. Handsome.
And the little boy. Beautiful boy.
David went down the slide many times. On his tummy.
And Nathaniel kept watching him.
So he kept doing it and laughing.
Our friend Ece and one of the neighbor boys came out to play, too. He brought out his swords which made Nathaniel super-happy.
I made considerable progress in my class but i am now running behind in many things. I feel tired and worn out a bit. So this is something I am going to have to take a step back and think about so that I can learn not to wear myself out. The list keeps growing even as I tackle more and more items.
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. I am grateful that we got to play outside some with friends today. Five kids. It was fun.
2. I am grateful that I already wrote lesson one and two, six more to go.
3. I am grateful for that i am walking and making art journal pages. I am making progress this month, even though sometimes it doesn’t feel so.
Three Things David’s Grateful For:
1. going to the park with Ece.
2. coloring.
3. playing wii
And finally friday is here. It’s been a fast week and a productive one both personally, work-wise, art-wise, and exercise-wise. All in all, pretty good. This morning, I was working on a project I’d promised someone and I thought I might want to use some of my stamps so I took a bunch out to go through them. As it turned out, I didn’t use them but they entertained Nathaniel for a good hour.
After lunch, he needed to be changed since he decided to smear his peanut butter sandwich all over himself. You can still see it in his pants. But he seemed to be in a good mood for the most part. This is the face he makes when I call him and he knows I want to take a photo.
And here he is posing for it.
He loves piling up David’s workbooks and going through them.
So while he did that, I worked and then we went out for my walk and then we picked up the big boy.
Who loves making faces.
And, I love him.
And then I snapped my one good photo of the day.
And decided to quit while I was ahead.
I finished most of my planned work for the weekend which means I can now work ahead and get started on my second BPC class for winter 2011. This one is an 8-week workshop so there’s quite a bit of work ahead of me. Sooner I start, sooner I can make progress.
I’ve been obsessing about whether I should break the blog into sections or not. Like photography, thoughts, scrapbooking, books, etc. Or to just leave it a jumble as it is now. Should i just list sections but still post it all here at once? No idea…. i will keep pondering, I spose. For now things stay the way they are until I find a solution I like.
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. I am grateful that Jake will be here in one more day. We miss him so.
2. I am grateful that making a list and organizing myself seems to really have helped. I already feel like some of the load is off my shoulders.
3. I am grateful for my new waterbrush pens. They are awesome.
Three Things David’s Grateful For:
1. making my W letter puppet (weasel).
2. coloring at home.
3. doing the phonics section in our workbook with mommy
Well this week is coming to an end really fast. But the listing of items has been working for me. I’m on a roll and getting stuff done. At a slower pace than I’d like and I haven’t read a page in my book all week but I have written most of my first class and I plan to finish it all tonight. It’s about perfectionism. Great topic. Then a few detours/commitments and onward to the second class!
David had a supershort day at school today so I had to get a lot done in the morning, including my walk and then run over to get him. I spent most of the afternoon working hard while Nathaniel slept and David colored. Both of the kids really love playing this game where they fall to the ground. Not sure why. They like doing it on the pillow, on each other, and on just nothing.
And David told me today that this is him doing ballet. I don’t think he’s going to have a career in ballet, do you?
Here’s Nathaniel grabbing the pillow (so he can fall on it.)
and his reaction to my saying no.
And more of it when he sees that it’s a firm no.
And, finally, full blown meltdown.
But my no stays no, so he goes and finds other adventures. Then he decides he’s hungry so he grabs the cinnamon crackers out of the pantry and brings them to me. And I get to snap what is likely my favorite shot of him.
And there we go.
An angel. that’s what my boy is. Both my boys. Even when they are melting down. Even when they are driving me literally insane. David lost two sweaters in school in two days. I was beside myself. I need to learn to be calmer. It’s better for him and for me. My jaw hurts like insane. Like 3-6 advils a day insane. Not good for either of us.
So far, I’m enjoying art journaling month but I am not sure i’m learning much or conquering my fears. I think I am not paying enough attention to it. I am still walking however. No less than a mile each day. Ideally two miles. So far so good. I’m almost done with the 7 habits so I will have to find another book to listen to. Any recommendations? Something non fiction I think. It’s easier to listen to nonfiction.
I bought some math books to do with David but neither are nearly as good as the reading book we’ve been doing. I wish I could find some fantastic ones. IF you know of any, please do let me know.
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. I am grateful that I am almost done putting together my new class. Big item off my list.
2. I am grateful that Jake seems to be enjoying himself in NY. I miss him like crazy but I am happy he’s happy.
3. I am grateful for the kind, happy mail from Caroline. Thank you so much Caroline, you’re truly amazing, generous and so supportive. I am deeply grateful.
Three Things David’s Grateful For:
1. sitting with maggie on the bus.
2. coloring at home.
3. sharing my book at school (the cat in the hat!)
I spent most of today working on my February class with BPC. I have two coming up back to back and the due dates are fast approaching so I’ve been working on the content. I love doing it but it also uses a lot of my energy. It’s been nice to have two days off work so I can focus on it but tomorrow’s back to work and I have a lot on my plate.
Here’s Nathaniel making one of his many many faces.
And David looking out the window. I am not sure if he knew I was taking this photo.
The kids have been playing on their own a lot. The room is very tidy today and that always seems to rub Nathaniel the wrong way.
And David’s been coloring up a storm.
Tonight I have book club here. I haven’t gotten all the items on my list done for today yet so I am a bit stressed but I am trying to stay optimistic. It will all work out. It always does, doesn’t it?
I am still full of thoughts. Still walking. 12 days in a row. I walked only 1 mile today but I told myself it’s better than nothing. I am still overwhelmed a bit but for the most part I am getting organized. Looking at the list is a bit overwhelming. I’ve been listening to 7Habits of Effective people as I walk. I have a lot of interesting thoughts that are coming out of it. I need to organize myself so I can think. And write.
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. I am grateful that I got a big task off my list today. It took me way longer than I’d hoped but it’s now finished. Thankfully.
2. I am grateful for book club tonight. Always good conversation and this time I don’t even have to drive.
3. I am grateful for the cleaning lady who has managed to make my house look spotless. She’s so so amazing.
Three Things David’s Grateful For:
1. celebrating maggie’s birthday
2. creating my batman story (he’s coloring a story)
3. making my V puppet at school (vampire bat)
Something a bit different. I am sorry if you don’t like flowers. I seem to have a thing for them.
Today was a bit better and I actually woke up with the drive to get things done. And I got a bunch done. And then tonight I finally got organized. I have a LOT on my plate but I feel like I can do it. It seems more possible now. Thankfully.
This is Nathaniel most of the time. He is in his seat and reaching for something other than what’s actually on his plate. It doesn’t even matter what, the other thing is more appealing.
And here’s David giving me “please please let me smile so she can leave me alone” face. Ugh. This made me feel bad. He looks so sad.
Here’s Nathaniel signing for food. He asks for food all day long. All day long. Literally.
And then I say, Nathaniel smile for me and I get this.
I love this. I don’t care that it looks funny. It’s perfect. It shows that he gets it. He knows that you smile. He’s been watching his brother practice and doing the same. He’s such a joy.
I’ve just finished writing the most of my lesson for the first class next year. I’ve replied to a slew of emails. If you’re awaiting an email from me, can I ask that you please please email me again? I might have totally missed it in the slump of the last ten days. I apologize. Please email me again.
I took today off work and tomorrow too. Not for a specific reason. Just to rest and not stress about work. And it worked. I felt more relaxed all day. Let’s see how tomorrow feels. How was your day? You’ve been quiet lately, I hope I’m not boring you to death.
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. I am grateful that I finally got organized. I now have a schedule. I work well with a schedule. It’s agressive but I can do it.
2. I am grateful for a few days off work. I need the rest.
3. I am grateful kindness from so many people. At the least expected times. For no reason. People are amazing.
Three Things David’s Grateful For:
1. taking the computer test (he took a test at school today apparently.)
2. playing cards with Daddy last night
3. coloring at school today
I’ve had this image open on my computer for weeks. Didn’t feel like using it for some reason.
I’ve been thinking a lot about imperfection today. It’s the topic of one of my new classes for 2011. So how about some normal-life photos? Imperfect ones.
First up is David’s school photo. Remember the one we practiced smiling for, for so many days? Well you can decide if it worked.
I’ll leave my thoughts out of it. Here’s a photo I snapped of him when he came home from school. He’s growing up so fast.
We have a lot of this at home. David lying on the couch, Nathaniel walking up to him and showing him things and sharing.
David doing snow angels on the floor.
Nathaniel crying cause David put the cards away in a drawer he cannot reach.
David lying on the couch and smiling at me.
And Nathaniel making his “I know you’re going to take a photo of me so I’ll smile” face.
This is our life. The ordinary moments. Nathaniel gives hugs each time you ask now. I was having a rough morning so as I cried on the couch, he came up next to me and gave me a big hug. All on his own. And then kept hugging me. I’m afraid I did not just snap out of it this morning as I’d hoped but I am finally feeling better now. An amazing, kind gesture by Amber and My Mind’s Eye (as if they didn’t already spoil me way more than enough) was sort of the moment that tipped it over. It was such a surprise, so much kindness that I literally couldn’t take it. I wept and then I went walking and decided I needed to let it all go. I have such an overwhelming todo list now that I am not exactly sure where to begin and I am experiencing one of those paralysis moments. It doesn’t help that I am exhausted, too.
I have so many thoughts on my mind. About meeting needs. About feedback. About setting goals and accomplishing them. Values and feeding them. So much swimming in there. Good thing it’s art journaling month. I have so many posts I want to write, too. About exercising. About my journaling. About happiness month back in July. But for now I have to work on my class work. I need to buckle down and get it out of the way. I think it will lift most of the weight off my shoulders.
Here’s to hoping good mood, positivity, and productivity return. And soon.
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. I am thankful for a completely unexpected package in the mail. Some wonderful, happy product from My Minds Eye. Pure kindness and generosity. I am deeply grateful.
2. I am grateful that I walked for the tenth day in a row. I am aching all over. Literally. But I am trying to keep going.
3. I am grateful that some of the undecided bits of my work are now decided. I am still more frustrated than I would have liked about some of it but at least there’s resolution and now I can move forward, hopefully.
Three Things David’s Grateful For:
1. playing Star Wars with Hasen (David was Luke)
2. coloring my U puppet (Umbrella Bird)
3. Checking out a Star Wars book from the library
Purple flowers. They are currently bringing joy into my home.
Happy 10.10.10. I hope yours went well. I’m still in the funk that seems to be enveloping me right now. I can easily list you many reasons for it but I think it’s time to just snap out of it. I’ve been thinking a lot about the “what you focus on flourishes” adage lately (I should make an art journal page on that one.) and I’ve been stuck on this negativity with one of the issues in my head and it’s time to let it go. I should either embrace the positive things about it or walk away from it. Both are viable options. Sitting and sulking and having conversations in my head over and over again is not a viable option. So expect a much better attitude tomorrow. Enough is enough.
I snapped very few photos today for some reason. This is one of the little boy.
And one of the big one.
And that’s it. Not sure why.
I did scrap, walk, and make an art journal page today. and I played cards with David. And we all went out to dinner together. So there was much activity. I just feel enveloped by negativity a bit. I am officially telling myself to let it go. let it go. let it go. do you think it will work if I just repeat?
Here’s to waking up with a better attitude tomorrow and hopefully finally getting to write all the thoughts on my mind. I hope your weekend was good. Giveaway coming tomorrow.
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. I am thankful that I got my ring back. I don’t know if you remember but a few months ago, the diamond in my engagement ring had fallen off. We found it and sent it in to get fixed. It took a long while and more money than I would have liked but here it is, back on my finger and it’s buffed and shiny.
2. I am grateful that jake and I spent some time playing Wii last night. It was super fun to play just the two of us.
3. I am grateful that I got to play cards with David today. It was so much fun to watch him play and win and lose and just have a good time with me.
Three Things David’s Grateful For:
1. coloring
2. playing crazy eight with mommy
3. going out to dinner together
Today I had a hair appointment. While I always dread going there and sitting for hours, I always feel happier on the way home. I look better which instantly improves my mood. I wonder if exercise will ever become that way for me.
David had a doctor visit his school last week and he got these gloves, which he decided made neat socks. I couldn’t help but laugh, too.
After I came back from the appointment, I sat to scrap a bit and Nathaniel discovered this hat and decided he had to wear it.
And since he’s so beautiful, I let him do whatever he wanted.
While David played Wii, of course.
And I walked. And Jake got groceries and is now upstairs bathing the kids. Ordinary, uneventful day. I love it so. Still in the thinking process here but I haven’t produced much yet. Need focus to sit and type things up but seem to be lacking focus and energy. It shall come back at some point, right? My todo list is only getting bigger.
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. I am thankful about my hair. I wish I could make it so pretty myself.
2. I am grateful that I walked again. That brings my sum up to 12.5 miles and eight consecutive days.
3. I am grateful for my husband, who’s been pitching in a lot the last few days. I’ve been sick and unmotivated and tired so it really helps so much to have him and more significantly, his energy.
Three Things David’s Grateful For:
1. coloring – he really loves coloring lately and I loved it so much too so it’s fun seeing this on the list again and again
2. playing wii
3. building my lego with daddy
For the last few days, I’ve been feeling more and more exhausted. Where lifting my arms has become an effort. I am also shivering and my head hurts. So it’s possible that I am getting sick. Not idea. It’s also meant that I am low on productivity and energy in general. I’ve been exercising and doing my art journal and then just letting everything else go. I’ve been going to bed at 8:30-9pm hoping to catch up on sleep to see if that will fix things. I am guessing it’s the extra exercise that’s making me tired but who knows.
When David’s at school, Nathaniel quietly goes through all of his things. Unless he’s destructive, I don’t meddle.
Today he discovered this sheet of star stickers I was using with David. And then stuck them all over himself.
And when I called him, he gave me this look, of course.
He also signed more for the first time. Did it perfectly. Flower, more, food, bye, thank you. all the ones I’ve tried to teach him, he’s learned. But no spoken words yet.
After I picked up David, I was so tired, nauseous and sick that I decided we needed to go out. So we went to a cafe and had some snacks and then did some shopping at Trader Joe’s. Now we have lots of fruit. I am always happiest when we have lots of fruit at home. When we got back, they played outside a bit while Jake and I chatted and I rested.
And now they’re asleep and I plan to snuggle up with Jake and then read some and head to bed. Plans for this weekend include some scrappy time, art journals, walking, writing BPC courses, and reading. I get to have some pampering time at the hair dresser, too. Small things. That’s what life is all about.
I changed my header today. Felt like it. I love this butterfly. It goes with my word for 2011 too. And I’ve been asked by several people if they can subscribe to my blog by email and now you can. If you look on the right, there’s a place for you to put your email. It will email you my new posts when I post them.
i was thinking maybe next year I’ll do monthly newsletters with some inspiring content. would that be interesting?
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. I am thankful that i have no big obligations and no impending deadlines. I need rest and I can get it.
2. I am grateful that my family is so amazing. so kind, so sweet. i am so so so blessed and i don’t want to forget it for a minute.
3. I am so grateful that I’ve walked 7 days in a row. I didn’t feel like doing it any of the days. And yet I did it. I got out there. I tried. I worked. One day at a time.
Three Things David’s Grateful For:
1. coloring at apple at school
2. helping avi and the teacher with a coin puzzle
3. playing a dice game at school
Not sure how i feel about that photo but I love the deep color in it.
I should start writing these earlier in the day, I’ve realized that after five pm, i hit a low for the day. I am exhausted and it all just descends on me suddenly so I am low on energy and positivity. Anyhow…
Here’s the face Nathaniel makes each time he sees the camera, now.
These shots were taken right after he woke up so his cheeks are red and he looks happy and rested. I love these photos.
And his funny, subtle, quirky faces.
My sister-in-law, Andee, makes these calendars for the whole family each year and both my kids love love LOVE looking through them. Thank you, Andee!
When we went to David’s school last weekend, we bought some used books for him. And he’s been reading them.
And there’s nothing that gives me as much joy as watching my son read.
Literally, nothing.
I love reading so much that seeing my kids doing it makes me deeply happy. I hope they love it as much as I have all my life.
I’ve been thinking more and more about 2011. And the rest of this year. My focus for October is the art journal and the walking. November will be a bit tricky with deadlines and short trip out of town and then my parents visiting. So I plan to keep walking and possibly pick something more flexible for the daily activity. Not sure why. Open to suggestions. Maybe drawing. Or watercolor. Something small, I can take with me. And then it’s December. December is all about December Daily for me. Tons and tons of family time. And planning and preparing for 2011.
For next year I think I will have year-long focuses like I did 52 things this year, and then monthly ones like LOAD. They both really help me in their own way. I also will be continuing with some of the things that I’m committed to or things I love like: layouts for The Girls’ Paperie, Tim Holtz, and A Million Memories, weekly books, daily diaries, creative therapy. Some things will end like 52 things, weekly gratitude (though I will continue the daily practice) and Crafting with David (which ended a while ago). And then some new ideas like: bringing back digital downloads, practicing other crafts like sewing/knitting/emboridery/etc., weekly art journal, weekly focus on health/exercise/diet, weekly books with david and journals with david. Those are some of my current ideas. I might get more or remove some. Who knows. I also want to do some more “thoughts” posts. Like the ones I do on Tuesdays for Weekly Gratitude. I used to write a lot of my thoughts on this blog and it sparked discussion and I loved it. So I am thinking it might be another good thing to do.
I will likely do a blog redesign. Probably a simple one that’s not drastically different but if you have input/feedback on the current blog look/feel let me know. I am open to comments.
That’s what’s on my mind today. How about you? What’s on your mind?
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. I am thankful that it’s almost Friday. I seem to be more tired than usual this week and I could use the extra rest time the weekend will bring.
2. I am grateful that despite not being so good at keeping in touch, I have some great friends who are amazing people.
3. I am so deeply grateful for the kind, amazing, deeply wonderful comments you’ve left recently. I am not great at getting back at people but I want you to know your words are touching my soul, where i need it the most and they make me feel so very very grateful. so, thank you. thank you. thank you.
Three Things David’s Grateful For:
1. coloring at school (pumpkin)
2. playing with avi during lunch
3. reading books (Maisy)
Argh. Today got away from me really quickly. But I am not complaining as I was able to work, do art journal page, read a tiny bit, and do my walk. I am low on photos today, thought. The big boy:
The little boy:
And again the big boy:
That’s all I got today. And I have to run out the door for a dinner and I have yet to do several items on my todo list. And I can’t believe it’s almost Thursday already. Sometimes days seem to crawl and other times, they just zoom by. I am feeling better today, thank you for your kind kind words and for telling me it’s ok to sulk on my blog. I try to be honest and realistic but not whiny. I don’t think that’s productive. But anyway. Things are better now and my jaw is in less pain, thankfully. I have several things I want to write about but I haven’t been able to get organized. I am hoping tomorrow is the day for that.
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. I am grateful for a dinner out with friends today. Some of these friends I haven’t seen in almost a year. I can’t wait to see them despite feeling like I’ve neglected my todo list.
2. I am grateful that I am still walking and trying to take care of myself.
3. I am grateful that I have more to do now. I am already getting more organized and I know I will get into a rhythm soon.
Three Things David’s Grateful For:
1. Making my S puppet (snake)
2. Drawing at school
3. Reading my Biscuit books
Nathaniel woke up at 4am this morning and even after I changed his wet pajamas, he wasn’t able to go back to sleep so I got up with him. And thus my day started on a rough note. I was so tired and it took forever to wake up and get started on my day. But I did do a bunch of work, finish my art journal page, and I even got a bunch of important todos done so the whole day wasn’t a loss.
I snapped this photo of Nathaniel in the morning. He is getting new signs now. Last night he learned to sign flower. But his favorite is food.
For the rest of the day, I got no photos. So when I came back from the doctor’s I snapped this one of David.
And Nathaniel had grabbed some plastic cups from the pantry and was playing with them. He’s so good at focusing on things. He loves playing and I love watching him play.
And I love how he knows I’m trying to snap photos and I call his name and he smiles. He doesn’t look up or stop what he’s doing. But he does smile. I love him so deeply.
That’s all the photos I snapped before it was time to go to sleep.
I had a doctor’s appointment for TMJ today. TMJ is the joint between your jaw and skull. Mine is swollen and causes noises in my ear and a lot of pain in my jaw and headaches. It’s gotten considerably worse since Nathaniel was born. To the point where I am consistently in pain. I’ve had this problem for eleven years and I tried to get it fixed in the beginning but it only got worse so I gave up. Today was the first time I even let anyone talk about treating it. And if I do what the doctor suggests, it means mouth guards night and day and therapy and more. And it might get better. Which is of course worth it but just the thought of all that work and all that effort is making me sad. It’s not something I want to take on. And yet I know I should. Just sucks. And I know many people have it much worse but I am just feeling a bit low so I will let it get to me tonight and then I promise not to whine about it starting tomorrow.
I’ve mentioned it a few times and I plan to write about it in a lot more detail but one of the things I decided to tackle for October (and onward) is my health. More specifically, I’ve been walking 30 minutes a day since Saturday. Today I only did 15 minutes but considering how I felt, that’s a miracle. I have a lot to say about this. I have had issues with the way I look ever since I can remember and while I’d like other areas of my life to improve, I know that at this point in my life, this is the single biggest issue for me. And if I were to actually face it head on and do something about it, it would change my life forever. So instead of putting it off (which is what I’ve been doing for 6 years now.) I am choosing to take it on. For now and November and December and all of 2011. This is going to be focus number one. I will drop other commitments or activities if necessary but not this. More on this later but I wanted to make sure to put it out there.
Today was a long day as is but then I received an email and reacted badly to it. Then I got full of regret and it pretty much killed the rest of my day. I rarely ever regret anything in my life. I tend to think a lot before I commit to things or take a step. I am a firm believer in integrity so I think before I commit to ensure I can deliver and then i just work without thinking of regret. But on the rare occasions where I do regret, especially hurting or disappointing someone, I handle it very badly. I get really really wound up and I want the issue to resolve immediately and wish that I should show the person how very sorry I am. On and on. This sense of urgency to resolve overwhelms me and takes over just about anything else in my life. When it happened today, I got very sad. And I realized that I need to work on this. I need to realize that these things happen sometimes and that I have to learn to be patient. I have to learn to let go and have faith that people know me and will not assume the worst of me. But it’s hard. Really hard. I don’t like disappointing people. So I am going to lay low tonight. Let myself wallow a bit and try hard to be patient. And hope that I didn’t damage anything permanently.
Today, I bought tickets to go to NYC in November. I will be gone for about 40 hours. 10 of which will be on the plane. It will be the first time I am leaving both kids behind. First time I am away from Nathaniel overnight. But I am going to see my sister whom I haven’t seen in a year and a half and her kids and husband whom I haven’t seen in almost 4 years. I miss them. I cannot wait to see them. Even if it means I have to be away from my boys for a little bit. Though that will be hard for me, too. I am glad I am doing it. It’s a step for me. I am not good at leaving my family. And I haven’t been to New York since 2006. It’s my favorite city in the world so it will be nice to walk its streets again, too.
Oh and I meant to say, today’s photo was not a cover. Just another page in my art journal that I was using earlier this year. And thank you for your kind words on it. I am telling myself that it’s not about how it looks. just about the process of doing it.
Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. I am grateful for glee and some snuggly time coming up tonight.
2. I am grateful the i walked despite the fact that I was feeling overwhelmingly tired today.
3. I am grateful that I bought my tickets to NYC. It had been on my list for two weeks now.
Three Things David’s Grateful For:
1. the little book my classmates made me (david told them what he likes – rainbows, trucks, jedis, school – and they each made drawings for him
2. getting my new legos
3. making my rabbit puppet
4. helping avi color today at school
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projects for twenty twenty-five
projects for twenty twenty-four
projects for twenty twenty-three
projects for twenty twenty-two
projects for twenty twenty-one
projects for twenty nineteen
projects for twenty eighteen
projects from twenty seventeen
monthly projects from previous years
some of my previous projects
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