Daily Diary – May 28 2010

More from the academy of sciences. There’s more too.

I wanted to get some simple snapshots of the ordinary parts of our day. Here are the kids playing as they do for hours every day. They like to rummage through the drawers and I love watching them.

David chasing Nathaniel around and both of them giggling.

Me trying to learn how to crochet still. This is picot stitch.

Nathaniel playing by himself.

Trying to figure out the details of the toys.

Me, trying to do a crochet in the round.

More playing. Walking around and discovering more toys.

And finally David and I playing legos (building a house in case you couldn’t tell.)

A wonderfully ordinary day: layout, breakfast, school, nap, work, school, food, skype, reading, working, crochet, nap, play, more play, daddy, dinner. wonderful.

blissful.

Note to Self:
I just finished my most recent audiobook and one of the points they make which has been true for me lately is that inspiration is fleeting. So when you feel inspired and are excited, you really need to sit and do the work. Because at those times you do 2 weeks of work in a day and when it’s not there you drag for weeks sometimes so while you feel inspired, dive in, capture it. Take advantage of it. I think this is really sound advice.

Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. I wrote the first BPS lesson last night and I am loving it and feeling in the groove. Grateful for groove.
2. For daddy coming home earlier and helping mommy out so much.
3. A nice, long weekend with some small but fun events planned.

Two Things David’s Grateful For:
1. Lego house.
2. Daddy. Sitting next to Daddy. Love Daddy.

Daily Diary – May 27 2010

From the Academy of Sciences. I am a bit obsessed with butterflies.

I love watching Nathaniel and David, especially Nathaniel being so curious and getting in David’s business. So far, David’s quite kind with him.

And there’s much rejoicing when Daddy comes home.

Especially from this one.

And then tickling and laughing.

And more hugging and love. It makes my heart swell.

May 27 already? Another ok day but I can’t remember much of it. I am so tired most of the day. Some emails, a bunch of work, taking care of the kids, and poof the day is done. Tonight I hope to read some and work on my BPS class some, the deadline is coming fast.

Note to Self:
A bunch of great links for you (and me) today. Talks that are definitely worth your time. Elizabeth Gilbert and Simon Sinek on how leaders inspire action via Kelly Rae Roberts.

And this movie about the surprising truth of what motivates us is also awesome.

All of them are worth your time. And food for thought and soul.

Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. I am grateful some great videos I watched that inspired me and made me think (see above.)
2. Grateful to find some awesome, simple crochet videos, been looking for those for a while now.
3. Grateful for this feeling of peace and self-content I have had lately. It makes me happy.

Two Things David’s Grateful For:
1. Daddy baby he’s so loving his daddy!
2. sticker book we bought at the store while mommy was getting crochet needles cause she couldn’t find the ones she bought before despite searching for hours.

Daily Diary – May 26 2010

More of my anniversary tulips. There will be more. I love these tulips.

We had quite a wonderful day today. I worked on my layout, Nathaniel and David ate and then Nathaniel napped while David was at school and then played by himself while I worked.

And then we went to get David.

After lunch, the kids Skype’d with their cousin Maya and their paternal grandmother and grandfather. Nathaniel is really into Skype. As soon as he sees the ringing tone, he looks for the screen and gets all excited. He also loves loves loves music and instantly starts to dance when there’s any on.

And then Nathaniel did a bit of this.

And then we put him on his chair while David and I did some crafts.

I also wanted to capture this little gem. He always likes to put his foot under the tray. He straightens his leg and sticks it right against the back of the top of the tray. Love these little quirks.

And now we’re winding the day down. I am about to go put the kids in the tub and we start our night routine. Daddy will watch some iphone movies with David and then they sleep. Then I get a few hours to unwind, read, and relax. And then bed.

What a wonderful life. I am so grateful.

Note to Self:
Now that the month is almost ending, I am trying to think of my project for June. I know the AMM kit will be coming in a week or so and I have to do more layouts but I still want to come up with something else for the month, too. I love getting up and being creative first thing in the morning. Maybe it’s finally time to jump into my portraits class with both feet which also means a return to my art journal, which I am ashamed to say is sitting untouched, no journaling, no art, nothing. I also have a whole bunch of creative therapy catalysts to work on. Maybe that should be my next priority. Maybe a combination. Maybe some stitching? I am not sure. Still exploring ideas. Anyone have suggestions?

Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. Getting some of my “really need to do this but I am putting off” items done for work.
2. Craft time with David. Loved today’s project!
3. Watching my kids Skype with their grandparents and cousin. It was so awesome to see how into it they were and how great it was to discuss the day’s events like they lived right here. I am so grateful for technology.

Two Things David’s Grateful For:
1. Craft time with mommy.
2. Daddy.

Daily Diary – May 25 2010

Flowers from the love of my life. They didn’t bloom yet but I wanted to capture them anyway. Tulips of all colors. Makes my heart swoon.

Today is my eighth wedding anniversary with my husband. We’ve been together sixteen years and married eight. We had a lot of different ideas on how to celebrate today but finally settled on going to the California Academy of Sciences as a family. At this stage of our lives, I cannot imagine having had a better way to honor our marriage than a day as a whole family, loving each other and having fun together. (We will go out to a fancy dinner, too, I promise, Mom, on our next date night. But we didn’t want to drag the kids to a nice restaurant. We wanted it to be fun for all of us.)

So we drove to the city and we first went into the rain forest. I even put shoes on Nathaniel in case he wanted to walk. (He didn’t all that much and he wasn’t a fan of the shoes so I took them off pretty soon after this. And his pants are all bunched up cause Jake was carrying him most of the time up till then.)

David loved the rainforest, seeing all the frogs and the lizards and the butterflies. And he liked being able to hug Nathaniel too since Daddy had put him down.

Here’s a green basilisk lizard for you.

And a frog.

We then went to the aquarium where I asked Jake to get some shots of me with the kids. I promised myself I would do that more. Even though the kids don’t seem to care much. That’s ok.

Here’s David showing Jake some fish that he saw. They had a lot of fun looking at everything.

We then took a break for some food since I knew Nathaniel was starving. And he was, poor guy, he devoured everything I gave him.

After “lunch” we went to see the penguins. Because there was no way I wasn’t seeing the penguins.

Some more food, a bunch of games, some more sightseeing and it was time to come home. David fell asleep on the way home but not the little one. He really does not like to nap in the car. I came home to the beautiful tulips and fed the kids, put them down and here we are. About to watch Glee. A wonderful ending to an incredible day.

And, of course, here’s the love of my life.

The father of my children, the owner of my heart, soul and my best friend in the whole wide world. I love you madly, deeply, and with every single part of my being my amazing husband. Thank you for choosing me. Thank you.

Note to Self:
Early in the day I watched Brene Brown’s Up Talk. Brene is an expert on on shame and shame resilience and I cannot recommend this movie enough. It’s profound. It’s really worth your time. I will likely watch it a few more times. I hope you take the time to watch it, too.

Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. My husband. My wonderful, amazing, patient, kind, funny, truly awesome husband.
2. Our full and fantastic day.
3. My family who remembered our special day and called us to congratulate us. I thought of my grandmother again today; she would have definitely called me. I love you Omama.

Two Things David’s Grateful For:
1. Our trip to the California Academy of Sciences
2. Getting to play video games at the academy of sciences.

Daily Diary – May 24 2010

Happy, relaxing day today. After last night’s LOST finale, it was hard to get up at 5 but the little one wakes up when he does and there’s no stopping him. So we woke up, we hugged, nursed, and just lay there until I felt awake which is when I started my layout. Took a bit longer to get going than usual today. But I had taken the day off so it was ok.

I pretty much lazied around all day. Read my book, surfed, etc. Then I played legos with David while Nathaniel explored everything around the room.

And in the drawers.

David and I built a lego restaurant that was on fire so the fire-woman came to put it out.

And then I made dinner for the kids while David continued to play.

A little glimpse into a life where I don’t work. Quite different, at least stress-wise. And now that the kids are sleeping, I plan to write tomorrow’s gratitude post and spend the rest of the night reading my book. I have tomorrow off, too so it’s another relaxing day waiting for me. I can’t believe there are only 7 days left in May. It passed way way too quickly.

Note to Self:
One of the things Karen mentioned during the retreat was to spend one hour a day playing with your kids. Where playing means not doing anything else and doing whatever they want. So today. I did that. I told David we could do anything he wanted. He had some trouble coming up with something at first but then he decided to play legos. We sat on the floor and built things and talked and had so much fun. And I think when we were done, he was genuinely happy. So was I. It was great to have some time just for us. I want to make a point of doing this more. Anything David wants. Just for a bit. It’s hard being a kid and being told what to do all the time, so I think it’s nice to give him some time everyday where he gets to make all the decisions and knows that he has 100% of my attention.

Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. Playing with David and Nathaniel today.
2. A quiet, relaxed, happy day.
3. A beautiful, touching card from my wonderful husband.

Two Things David’s Grateful For:
1. playing legos with mommy.
2. daddy! he’s so thankful for daddy so often that it makes me happy.

Daily Diary – May 23 2010

Last night I went to bed at 6pm and woke up briefly at 7:30 and went right back down at 8:30 and slept until 4am when David came into my room to blow his nose (it was dark and I didn’t realize until the morning that his nose was actually bleeding when I woke up to find a bunch of blood on my sheets.

Then Nathaniel woke up briefly after, and thus began our day. I hugged my kid for a while and then did my page for today. Nathaniel went down for his nap and took a long one, look at him when he wakes up. He’s all pink and I love it.

And then he decided to turn the TV on and off for fun. He’s really good at that.

We spent the rest of the day watching movies. We’re both exhausted so it was really the very best way day to spend our day and add to that some delicious goat cheese sandwiches and I was in heaven. And now we’re watching more TV and I can’t wait for Lost finale tonight and I am off work for the next two days so it’s more of this. Yes! I need the relaxing time, I need the rest.

oh and HAPPY BIRTHDAY Aksel and Jeff, I love you both so much!!!

Note to Self:
I’m listening to Rework and one of the things they talk about is the need for focused attention. I was thinking I need to do this more. One thing at a time. Set the kitchen timer and just focus on one thing fully. Hard with the kids but when Nathaniel is napping and David is at school and when they are both sleeping. There are chunks in the day where I could do this. And I need to do it more often. Regain some focus. It’s worth trying isn’t it?

Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. I am grateful that I finally got some rest and I need more.
2. I am grateful that my husband sat with me all day and we watched movies and laughed with the kids and I am so peaceful now.
3. I am grateful for Layout of the day. I’ve learned so much in the last 24 days.

Two Things David’s Grateful For:
1. Legos. He’s still playing with the legos like crazy.
2. Daddy.

Daily Diary – May 22 2010

I am exhausted. I can barely hold my head up. I have so much to say but no energy. None.

So I’ll just say. HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOMMY!!! I LOVE LOVE LOVE YOU. Here we are videoconferencing and singing her happy birthday.

And David playing the wii.

And Nathaniel playing too.

I have much to say. More coming tomorrow, I promise.

Note to Self:
Today’s note is simple: I need to get more rest. A lot more.

Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. I am grateful for today’s retreat. More soon.
2. I am grateful to be home and about to go to bed.
3. I am grateful for my life. For every bit of it.

Two Things David’s Grateful For:
1. wii day!!
2. getting to go to my friend’s birthday

Daily Diary – May 21 2010

When David’s gone, Nathaniel loves playing with anything he might have left at his table. Today it was the crayons.

Here’s me telling him not to touch.

And here they are later in the day. I love these boys. I am grateful for them through and through.

This promises to be a long (and hopefully wonderful) weekend. Both Jake and I took Monday and Tuesday off as Tuesday is our anniversary and we hope to have some family fun in the next four days.

Well, not tomorrow really since I am gone pretty much all day tomorrow to the Mother’s Retreat, about which, of course, I have mixed emotions. And since I have to leave quite early and am not sure how the rest of the day will do, I did my layout for tomorrow already. It’s for the AMM blog and I can only show a sneak anyway. But that’s 22 layouts so far. Quite amazing if you ask me. I am also hoping to sit and journal a bunch this weekend for next week’s layouts. Let’s see if it happens.

Note to Self:
Today I just wanted to leave a note to myself that sometimes it takes 100 trips to 100 situations where I don’t know anyone to meet the one person who might end up being a great friend. So I need to go out more often. Take chances. Be willing to get out of my cocoon. It’s ok. It will be worth it. And if it’s not, it’s a growing experience and that’s worth it. Right? Right.

Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. Grateful for the long weekend.
2. Grateful (albeit scared) for my retreat tomorrow.
3. Grateful for Advil today as my aches and aches.

Two Things David’s Grateful For:
1. I’m grateful for daddy.
2. grateful for watching lego movies with daddy!

Daily Diary – May 20 2010

I can’t believe it’s May 20 already. This month has flown by, maybe cause I’m doing LOTD or maybe it’s cause time just passes too fast now. Either way this month is over and next thing you know we’re halfway through this year. My boy is going to finish preschool soon and it’s all too amazingly fast.

I am not one of those parents who runs from activity to activity with her kids. My kids spend most of their days at home playing. So many parents ask me what they do all they long and this is it.

They eat toys, they play with toys, they walk around, they watch movies, they play in the yard, and then they play more with legos. Sometimes we do workbooks. Sometimes we laugh and listen to music. But most of the time I’m quietly working away and so are they.

Sometimes this makes me feel like I must be a bad parent that I am not taking my kids to the park enough or giving them more opportunities to explore activities, socialize, etc.

But then I decide I don’t care. This is me. This is us. I have to work, I get to be home and more involved than some and less than others. This is the best I am able to be right now. (Here’s Nathaniel at today’s playgroup.)

We spent most of today working/playing. Then we briefly went to playgroup here and then at night we had dinner guests. Our neighbor with two kids same age as ours. Nathaniel was sleeping but David played with their girl and their little boy was a gem while we ate delicious food and chatted. It was quite nice company. And I am glad we did it. I am always too lazy, busy, tired to have friends over or make new friends. It’s good to do it occasionally.

Note to Self:
Last night I went to a book club meeting with a mom’s group. I didn’t know a soul there and even though I read all of the book, I really didn’t like it. So I was worried about showing up to a room full of strangers and talking about it. But of course I ended up talking and talking and talking. Cause that’s what I do. I am very talkative. Too talkative. I get excited, I talk more. Nervous. Talk more. Worried, talk even more. It won’t stop. And then on the way home, I worried the whole time about how I must have made such a bad impression since I talked and interrupted and was so emphatic. But then I chastised myself for belittling myself. Yes, I can and should do better but also this is me. I talk a lot. I get excited. I am not rude (at least I don’t think so) and I have a lot of good qualities so I need to cut myself slack. More specifically, this is something I do have control over. So I should either shut up or be ok with the fact that I talk so much. It’s stupid to do it and then get all sad about something I can’t change anymore. I need to let the past go, even when it’s immediate past. Ok to learn from it but not ok to harp on it.

Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. Grateful for some nice company and good friends for my boys.
2. Grateful for Nathaniel’s playtime. He’s such a good kid and had so much fun.
3. Grateful for a full but not overwhelming day.

Two Things David’s Grateful For:
1. Grateful for getting to play with the neighbor’s little girl.
2. Grateful for coloring.

Daily Diary – May 19 2010

Roses are….not always red.

Doing the diary early today as I am going out tonight as soon as the kids are in bed. Great day today so far. I did my layout, played with the kids, we even sat outside for a while, I did a whole bunch of work, and now I am doing bits and pieces of stuff before I go tackle my inbox again.

As we sat outside, I snapped photos of both of the boys. See all the food on his shirt? Everything always ends up on his shirt.

And the big boy with his funny smiles.

This photo is terrible but I promised I would take more “doing things” photos so here is one. I’ll do better next time.

I am feeling happy today. For no reason. Well I guess cause I feel like I accomplished stuff and that always makes me feel good.

I’m listening to Paperclipping Roundtable right now. I like listening to it when I am doing things. If you haven’t ever heard it and are into scrapbooking, I recommend it.

Note to Self:
I haven’t had to drive David to school this morning cause he’s on vacation for two days and it’s amazing the difference this makes in my life. The 45 minutes it takes to drive him and come back and then the other 45 mins to go pick him up and back (only 2 hours later) really breaks up my morning. It makes me feel like the time goes from 8:30 to 12:30 in a matter of minutes and then the day is over. I’m sure it’s half psychological but it still makes a difference. Soon, school will be over and he’s going to be home all day in the summer. It also means I’ll have to think of some alternatives because I am guessing he will get bored out of his mind. The schedule change will be a blessing though as Nathaniel is going through nap confusions between two and one a day. It’s funny the impact these things have in my life. But they do. And I am working on reducing things that add craziness to my life. I think that’s an area I need to work on. Finding things that throw me off so I can try to alter them. (sorry for the rambling today!)

Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. I got a whole bunch of punches in the mail today. I am addicted to them lately and they make me so happy.
2. Grateful to have gotten some work done today. Some stuff I’d been putting off.
3. Grateful to be going out tonight. I hope it goes well!

Two Things David’s Grateful For:
1. Batman movies.
2. Daddy!
3. Legos.

Daily Diary – May 18 2010

Yum. Don’t you love these?

So I woke up this morning at 4:45 with Nathaniel screaming and I must have been so tired that my eyes were still closed and I banged right into the wall. So hard that I gave myself a nosebleed. My face is still hurting and it wasn’t the best way in which to start the day. But oh well…

The rest of the day went well. I did my layout, I did work, I spent time with the kids, David and I did a tiny crafty project and we even went to the doctor to get his kindergarten paperwork done. Wohoo.

I wasn’t so good about photos, though. I got one of Nathaniel playing.

One of the big boy.

One of the little boy.

And a funny face for good measure.

That’s it from here. It’s 8pm already and I am excited to watch Glee in one hour and then I am guessing I will snore quite well tonight with the aches and all. I can’t believe I have done 18 layouts in the last 18 days. I really didn’t think I’d last this long. Go me.

The rest of this week is a bit more stressful as I have plans for both tomorrow and Thursday night. This would ordinarily make me happy and I am excited about the plans but I also feel like I will get less sleep and less quiet time than usual. Then again, I do have meditation on Saturday so that will make up for it.

Note to Self:
I’ve been thinking lately about how good things are. Especially between Jake and me. We’ve had our ups and downs for sure. We’ve been together 16 years and next week is our 8th wedding anniversary. And right now, things are so good. We’re happy. We love each other. We really like each other and we’re both enjoying life a lot. And I want to remember this. Cause tough times will come and that’s just life but this way I’ll remember that good times will come back as they always do. Life is cyclical and it’s easy to lost perspective when things are rough. So it’s best to record both the good and the bad times. To remind myself that everything passes.

Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. Grateful for Glee of course. That show makes me happy.
2. Grateful for a really special Creative Therapy catalyst tomorrow.
3. Grateful for not having done more damage this morning. Thank God!

Two Things David’s Grateful For:
1. I’m grateful for my Daddy.
2. Grateful for the lego batman movies with my daddy!

Daily Diary – May 17 2010

I like the subtle linen texture on this.

Nathaniel’s been practicing putting the headphones on. He doesn’t really have it down yet but he’s working on it.

He’s figuring out more of his toys, discovering new parts.

He also smiles around 400 times a day.

And so does his brother. (albeit his looks a bit more fake.)

And they both like to play. And they’re both really into the legos lately. I love legos!

I woke up feeling down today. Then I made my layout which I hated which got me in an even worse mood and I was grouchy and frustrated and that’s how most of the day went. I gave myself a pep talk sometime in the middle of the day so it was better than it could have gone but not really the best day. Oh well, it happens.

Thank you for your kind words on my layouts, I really really appreciate them and I do get up and make them each morning. I don’t ever do a bunch in a row either. Just one every day. I wanted to know if I could so I am trying. Let’s see how it goes. So far, so good.

Note to Self:
David and I started a new thing where we made a schedule and each day of the week we practice one thing. Mondays is math, Tuesdays is craft time, Wednesdays is Writing, Thursdays is Workbooks and Fridays is Reading. We do it right at 4pm which is the beginning of my stressful time. This forces me to take a little bit of time out and spend it with David. I generally give Nathaniel a snack if he’s not playing or otherwise busy. It’s David and Mommy time for a little bit. We’ve only been doing it for a week but so far so good. I am hoping it keeps working. I love being able to spend some time with just me. I think it’s important to spend 1-1 time with each member of my family and hope to do more of it. This is a mental note to make time for it.

Three Things I’m Grateful For:
1. I am grateful for my confort food: coffee and graham crackers (and some chocolate.)
2. Grateful for my little tulip plant that’s blooming like crazy (thank you Ty for watering it!)
3. Grateful for good friends and long phone conversations.

Two Things David’s Grateful For:
1. I’m grateful for my whole family.
2. and the toys they bought me!