Catalyst
Nineteen is: Create art around one of your quirks/idiosyncrasies.
I never learned how to really drive until I was thirty. I left Turkey
before the legal age to get a license (eighteen) and then went to
college where I didn’t need a car. And then I lived in New York for
seven years, where, again, you didn’t need a car. So I was almost thirty
by the time we moved to San Diego where you couldn’t do anything without
a car. Let me be the first to say that learning to drive at thirty is
not the same as when you’re sixteen and dying to have some freedom. It’s
scary.
So here we are, four years later, and now I can drive. Well, just
barely. I still don’t get on the freeway. I am still pretty nervous.
But, I can go to work, to the library, and grocery store. I can also go
to David’s doctor’s and mine. That’s about all I need. For now at least.
OH, have I mentioned I can’t ride a bike either? Yes, I know. I am
transportation-challenged. Then again, I can walk just fine.
Most of the time.
Catalyst
Twenty is: How do you feel about your name?
Yes, Karen is an ordinary name but when you remember that I was born and
raised in Istanbul, Turkey, doesn’t it seem so much less ordinary? I
love my name cause, in my own way, I feel like my parents must have
known that I was going to end up needing a nice, American name so I love
my name to bits.
Catalyst
Forty is: What’s a principle you firmly believe?
This is the quote that resonates the most with my principles. People are
quick to complain about the world we live in; they are quick to judge.
Yet they are not nearly as quick to jump in and help make change. I
believe we’re all part of the problem and we all need to be part of the
solution. Change begins with you. Be the change you want to see in the
world. If we all did that, imagine how amazing things would be.
Catalyst
Forty-One is: What’s the best advice anyone ever gave you?
This might sound funny but the best piece of advice I ever got was from
husband. Before I met him, if the phone rang, I had to get it
immediately. It didn’t feel like a choice, more like something I was
required to do. He taught me that just because it’s ringing, I don’t
have to get it right now. It sounds silly, but it’s actually a statement
about priorities and owning my own life. Deciding when to do what and
not letting others dictate it for me, not even a telephone. It might
sound silly but, for me, it was profound.
Catalyst
Forty-Two is: What was the best moment of your life (so far)?
I have a strong belief that any particular moment couldn’t be possible
without all the ones that came before it. So to pick on moment without
acknowledging the others wouldn’t be fair since, without them, I could
have never had that particular moment.
I’ve had many magnificent moments in my life: coming to the US,
graduating from college, getting my green card, marrying my husband,
giving birth to my son, being pregnant with my second. There are too
many to count. But at this moment, I am happiest I’ve ever been. I feel
content, peaceful, optimistic and thankful. I know it wouldn’t have been
possible without all the moments that came before this so I am thankful
for every moment that led to this one and for this very moment.
The catalyst
is up. It’s: What was a dream you had as a child (about your future);
did it come true or not? If it did, was it what you hoped it would be
and if it didn’t are you disappointed?
Here’re my words:
Since as far back as I can remember, my biggest dream was to leave home
and go pave my own path. I wanted to make my own mistakes, live my own
life, make my own choices. I certainly did leave my home (Istanbul) and
moved very far away. I made a new life for myself here in the United
States, and I am really lucky to say that, so far, I’ve loved every
moment of it. I miss my family a lot but I love paving my own path, even
with its bumps along the way.
This week’s catalyst
is: Tell us about something you don’t appreciate enough. (something that
you take for granted)
I wrote:
I don’t know what I did to be the luckiest Mom in the world, but I
really feel like I am so blessed. Maybe every Mom thinks her kid is
wonderful but so many strangers tell me how special you are every day.
You’re kind and generous. You are sweet and helpful. You are pensive and
quiet. Yet when I go out with you, you talk to everyone. You can walk up
to a stranger and start a conversation. You go, “Hi, I David. I three
years old.” And people can’t help but laugh. Which you then take as your
cue to keep talking. You can play with anyone, you’re not choosy. I love
all of this about you.
But my favorite thing is what I see when I watch you when you’re not
looking. When you’re lost in your own little world, playing with your
cars or trains or blowing bubbles. You have such a rich fantasy life;
you can play for hours by yourself and you tell yourself stories.
Sometimes I interrupt and ask you what you’re saying and you say, “I
talking to myself Mommy.” I guess in that way you’re my little boy. A
self-content little boy.
David, I don’t know how I got so lucky as to have a son like you but I
want you to know that I will never take any moment of it for granted.
Last week’s catalyst
was: Today you get an extra hour, what will you spend that time on?
I wrote:
There are always so many things on my to-do list but if I had one extra
hour I would want to spend it with my son and my husband, I can never
get enough of either in my life.
I wanted to note that after I made this art journal page, I immediately
felt like it wasn’t that good. Certainly not good enough to be in the
company of these amazing artists, but then I remembered my own words:
this is not a competition. It did make me feel better to make the art. I
do love my son so much and I really do want to spend all my hours with
him. So my art was therapeutic and true. That’s all that matters in the
end. I’ve heard some comments that people don’t want to participate
because they feel their art isn’t good enough. I promise you that your
art is good enough. If it’s authentic to you, it’s absolutely beautiful
and I hope you choose to share it with us so we can enjoy it, too.
We just posted catalyst
thirty-six. It’s Tell us about a time you lied.
Here’s my entry:
I try hard not to lie, but when we found out we were expecting and I was
only four weeks along, I had to keep it a secret for 9 weeks until I got
the OK from the doctor. During that time I was very ill, throwing up
several times a day, which made it that much harder to keep it a secret.
People invited us to dinner parties and lunches and I had to keep lying.
People at work started to wonder why I was sick all the time and my
friends were curious why I dropped off the face of earth. It was the
hardest secret to keep and some of the most difficult weeks of my life.
Now that the cat’s out of the bag, it feels great not to have to lie
anymore.
Journaling Reads:
I am really bad at keeping secrets. Especially when it’s good news. So
when I found out that I was pregnant (It took three tests for me to
believe my own eyes.) and it was only four-weeks, I knew we were going
to have to keep this secret for a long time. And then I got sick. Really
bad nausea meant that our little secret became a collection of lies.
Reasons why I was so tired, why I was unable to eat, why I looked so
white. Eight weeks of lying later, I was finally able to share and it
felt so good to tell everyone. To finally acknowledge you in front of
everyone. Can’t wait to see you, little one.
This week’s catalyst
is: What’s your philosophy of life? (Tell us a quote that conveys it,
show us photos from it, express in your own words.)
We have the one and only Ali Edwards this week so you must go
visit.
Here are my words:
I made this layout well before the election and I know that these three
little words have such a bigger meaning now but this has always been my
personal motto, so I wanted to put a note to let everyone know it isn’t
politically intended. Regardless of which way you lean politically, I
think believing in yourself and your ability to do anything you want is
a very powerful message for all of us.
Journaling Reads:
There are many things I believe in. The power of love. The generosity of
others. Kindness.
But one particular phrase has now become my philosophy of life.
“Yes, I can.”
Throughout my life, many different people told me about things I
couldn’t do. “With those grades, you can’t get into that college,” “I’m
afraid you can’t sign up for this class, you’re too young,” “You can’t
get that job,” “You can’t learn Japanese at the age of twenty-six,
you’re too old.” These are just a few of the hundreds of such comments
people shared with me.
Encouraging, isn’t it?
Well, it turns out, for me, it is actually encouraging. It turns out I
can’t stand hearing the word “You can’t.” I hate the idea of anyone
telling me what I can or cannot do. So once I hear those words, I
suddenly have all the energy I need to prove them wrong.
A few years ago, I stumbled into this Mark Twain quote, “Keep away from
people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that,
but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.” It
immediately became my favorite quote. I totally agree with what he says.
Small people. I love to prove them wrong.
I believe anyone can succeed at anything they want to. Anyone. I believe
I can do anything I put my mind to. I have. Over and over again. I
believe life is too short to live amongst small people. I believe it’s
important to surround yourself with people who are amazing and to let
them encourage you to be your very best, as well.
Each time you hear that little voice inside you that wonders if you can
achieve something you really want, hear this:
“Yes, you can!”
Trust me.
We posted catalyst
thirty-four yesterday. It is: Tell us about a song that brings back
a memory. Tell us about the memory too.
Here are my words:
For me, songs are big buckets of memories. I have a long list of songs
where a few melodies can put me in a different location, mood, and
spirit immediately. Of all the songs in my list, one stands out above
and beyond the others. When I was a Junior in college, I started dating
the man who is now my husband. My Junior and Senior year, I spent a lot
of time in he and his roommate’s dorm. My Senior year, we all loved “Son
of a Preacherman” so much that we decided to play it on repeat. This
continued for an entire semester. The CD player was never off. When we
went to sleep, we’d lower the volume and when any of us walked into the
room, we’d say “Oh my God! turn it up! it’s my favorite song!!” This
became our own inside joke. When I think back to my college years, Son
of a Preacherman is one of my very favorite memories. A sign of fun
times and beginnings of a long lasting love.
We posted catalyst
thirty-three over at creative therapy. This week’s catalyst is: If
you had unlimited money to buy someone you know something, what would
you buy and for whom?
Here are my thoughts:
This is one of the few catalysts that had me thinking for a long time.
For some reason, I couldn’t come up with an answer. I thought and
thought. Finally, as I was driving to work one morning, the answer hit
me. I wanted to buy a bookstore, for me. Was it too selfish to use this
money for myself? Maybe. But I decided that’s what my catalyst was going
to be about anyway. Even if others think it’s selfish.
Years ago, I volunteered at this amazing bookstore in New York City.
This store looked the way bookstores should look. It has wooden, spiral
staircases. Tables everywhere for people to sit and browse. A little
coffee shop in the back to relax and enjoy. Fantastic, knowledgeable
staff. And some of the best speakers and authors came to read at the
store. The best part was that the bookstore was completely non-profit.
All the books were donated and all the proceeds went to this
organization that provided shelter and aid to people who were affected
by AIDS.
Ever since my years at that store, I’ve always wanted to have a
nonprofit bookstore of my own. One full of used, donated books. One with
a little coffee shop of its own. One with volunteers who love books as
much as I do. One where people love to visit and where great authors
come to read from their masterpieces. One where all the proceeds are
donated across nonprofits. My passion is education so I would start by
donating to nonprofits that favor education but my hope is that we can
affect change in some way. Even if it’s a tiny one.
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projects for twenty twenty-four
projects for twenty twenty-three
projects for twenty twenty-two
projects for twenty twenty-one
projects for twenty nineteen
projects for twenty eighteen
projects from twenty seventeen
monthly projects from previous years
some of my previous projects
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