 This card says: Shining means making choices that bring out the best of you. Making choices that allow you to show, be, feel the best version of yourself. So you can show up and be kind. Be present. Be generous. Be open. Taking the time to be.
This one is a bit of a loaded one for me. There are so many ways in which I need to work on being the best version of myself all the time and if I don’t give myself the rest and care I need, it am definitely not my shining self.
This is what the whole nourishing intent is aiming for. Exercising, eating well, sleeping a lot, nourishing my skin, journaling, reading, learning, taking alone time, giving are all parts of the formula that allow me to be my best self. I need to do all of these regularly. I need to make sure there’s space for every one of them.
When I am well-nourished, I can be the best version of myself. I can show up ready to listen. ready to give. Ready to receive.
Ready to be present.
It’s been quite a challenge lately. I’ve been tired and overwhelmed and when I am in this space, it’s much more difficult to show up and be patient.
When I am shining, though, I am there. Both physically and mentally. I am present. 100%.
Shining Means is a Monthly Project for March 2017. You can read more about my projects for 2017 here. You can read about the start of this project here.
 This card says: Shining means letting go of who you think you “should” be and letting yourself be who you really are. Showing up as the real, authentic you and choosing to show up that way again and again. Always.
Oh man.
I know this one sounds like the same one as Tuesdays, but it’s even more. When I shine, I let others see my authentic, true soul.
It doesn’t necessarily mean that I am being vulnerable, though it can. It just means I am being myself. 100% myself. Whatever that means in each situation.
It doesn’t mean I am being rude, or loud, or putting others down. It means I am being myself and not apologizing for who that is. It means I am wearing what feels right, eating what feels right, and doing what feels right to me. Honoring my true self, my values, my perspective. With kindness, of course.
I often feel conflicted about my sense of belonging which makes it hard for me to be ok showing up as who I am in many situations because what if who I am is not enough? Sometimes I choose not to show up. Sometimes I choose to show up really guarded. Sometimes I choose to show up and do what needs to be done. And sometimes I choose to just show up, and be me.
In those rare times, I am shining. I am not apologetic or rude or loud or quiet. I am just me. I don’t overthink or question everything I do or say. I just show up as me and hope that’s good enough. Those are the moments I want to have more of and the moments I feel I am actually my very best self.
Shining Means is a Monthly Project for March 2017. You can read more about my projects for 2017 here. You can read about the start of this project here.
 This card says: Shining means seeing the good in every situation. Understanding that nothing is clear or 100% white or black. Being able to look at it from multiple perspectives and allowing the space for there to be some good to come out of each situation.
This is the trick to life isn’t it?
Being able to see things from multiple perspectives and understand that there is no such thing as “the truth” is one of the biggest lessons I have learned as I grow up and it’s something I have to remember again and again and again.
I’ve also learned that there’s no such thing as a guaranteed good outcome. Sometimes what you think is good turns out to have challenging side effects and a “bad” outcome turns out to be a blessing in disguise. So here, too, there’s no black or white. It’s all the shades of gray all the time.
I am trying to learn how to be more open minded all the time. Sometimes even realizing that I am being close minded is a challenge and other times it’s easy for me to be open and able to see that I am holding on to a perspective.
To me, shining means realizing that everything, all the time, is going through my interpretation of what things mean. There are very few “truth”s in the world and almost everything is what I make it out to be. So when I am shining I can see the good in everything. I can see that there are many ways to look at a situation and I can find the perspective that is the most empowering and choose to believe that one.
Shining Means is a Monthly Project for March 2017. You can read more about my projects for 2017 here. You can read about the start of this project here.
 This card says: Shining means telling the truth. always. Kindly but still only the truth. Always the truth. Not being afraid of being honest. Not lying awkwardly. Telling the truth with as much kindness as possible. Shining means being high integrity.
This is something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately. I’ve recently had a situation where I ended up being dishonest and awkward about a situation just because I was worried about putting the other person in a difficult spot. This instance made me feel bad for weeks and I am still thinking about it today because it just doesn’t sit well with me that I had to bend the truth so much. After spending some time thinking about it, I decided that I would never again do this. I would tell the truth in the kindest, most straightforward way and if that made the other person a bit uncomfortable, I’d have to live with that.
I don’t want to put anyone in a situation they don’t want to be in, but I realized that the path I took in order to avoid awkwardness on the other person’s side still ended up making everything awkward anyway. If I had just been straight with her, it would have been no more awkward and I wouldn’t have felt like I was lying the whole time. All I get to say is the truth, in the kindest way possible and how others choose to interpret that is not on me.
Soon after I made this decision, I was tested with another situation where I wanted to turn down an offer but I was worried the other person would be offended and this was someone I love so I didn’t want to hurt them. But I bit the bullet and I was honest. I turned it down really gently, thanked the person and offered an alternative. And it worked out.
I believe that when I am being my honest, kind self, I am making room for others to be their honest, kind selves too. We all get to shine.
Shining Means is a Monthly Project for March 2017. You can read more about my projects for 2017 here. You can read about the start of this project here.
 This card says: Shining means loving unbounded. Loving everyone. Loving all the time. With flaws and all. We are all flawed. We all could use kindness and help but most of all we all deserve love. Shining means having that love be visible to all.
Oh man, this is the easiest one. What could shining mean but love. Just unbounded love.
Pouring out of everywhere. I want love to come out of my pores. When I shine, that’s what happens. I love everyone, I love everything. I love my life. I love life itself.
We might not like everyone, We might not like everything someone does but we can love them. We can love all people.
Does this seem a bit woo-woo? Maybe it is. but it’s how I want to feel. When I shine, it’s how I feel. I want my friends and family to be able to see the love in my face. To see it come out of my eyes and my words and pour all over them.
I can’t do this very often but when I can, I am in such peace. And when people do it to me, I feel so incredibly lucky.
Shining Means is a Monthly Project for March 2017. You can read more about my projects for 2017 here. You can read about the start of this project here.
 This card says: Shining means forgiving everyone, all the time. Forgiving the people who love you. Forgiving random people that come in and out of your life. Forgiving your family. Forgiving friends. And most of all, forgiving yourself. You can’t shine with all that guilt.
The older I get, the less I believe in grudges. The less I believe in judging others. The less I badmouth anyone. I am fully stepping into a live and let live way of living. Life is so hard and most of us are doing the best we can. It really doesn’t help to judge others. We are here to help each other.
If someone messed up, it doesn’t help to hold a grudge. When I choose to shine, I choose to forgive. Without asking for anything in return. I forgive fully and completely. If that person meant it, well then I can choose new friends. But in general I think very few people are malicious. People just mess up.
All. the. time.
And so do I. I mean well. But I am human. I am fallible. I disappoint others. I disappoint myself. I mess up. I hurt people. I drop the ball. I am not the best version of myself. So very often.
But when I am shining, I pick up the pieces, I apologize, I forgive myself, I forgive others and I let it all go. I choose to believe in leaving the guilt and anger behind and choosing the light.
Shining Means is a Monthly Project for March 2017. You can read more about my projects for 2017 here. You can read about the start of this project here.
 This card says: Shining means being vulnerable. Taking your truth and standing with pain and sorrow. Being willing to be who you are. Being willing to sit with your pain and with the pain of others. Creating the safe space for others and allowing them to create it for you. Being willing.
It’s so hard to be vulnerable. It’s hard to sit with your own pain. It’s hard to feel the pain. It’s so much easier to try to numb the pain. With sleep, with food, with exercise. With whatever your thing is. To do whatever you can to not feel it because feeling it sucks.
But I’ve learned that those feelings don’t go away. Just because you ignore them or numb them or bury them, they don’t actually disappear. Just because you don’t want to feel them it doesn’t mean that you can get rid of them.
They stay there until you work through them. At least that’s what I believe to be true. And as hard as it is to sit with your own pain, sitting with someone else’s pain is even harder. Especially if it’s someone you love.
I always just want to make it better. I want to take their pain and put it on myself. I want to fix it. I want to make it better. I want it to go away. But just like you have to work through yours, they have to work through theirs. All you can do is sit with them. Create the space. Make it safe. And just be there. It’s so hard to just be there.
When I am shining, I can be that space for others. I sit there. I listen. I hold their hands. I sit with them in the pain but I don’t try to solve it or make it go away. This is the gift I can give them when I am the best version of myself.
Shining Means is a Monthly Project for March 2017. You can read more about my projects for 2017 here. You can read about the start of this project here.
 This card says: Shining means apologizing. Not just saying “I’m sorry” but also meaning it. Looking a person in the eye, acknowledging the pain caused and asking for how one can make it better. Really meaning what you say and intending to make things better. You can’t shine with all that weighing you down.
I love this one. Shining is about being honest. Meaning it. It’s not about not doing wrong, it’s about owning your wrongdoing. Stepping up and saying what needs to be said. I have no problem apologizing most of the time. I don’t like to make mistakes. I don’t like to hurt people’s feelings, especially the people I love. When I do hurt them, I have no problem apologizing. But I don’t always do all the things I’ve outlined above. I don’t always suggest ways to make up for it.
I intend to make things better but in some areas I fail more often than I’d like. I feel like some mistakes I repeat too often. Some hurts I keep re-inflicting and I would like to get better at that. I’d like to do more than “intend” to do better, I’d like to make a plan and actually take steps in order to do better.
I also would like to be able to let go of the small things. Sometimes I find I get stuck on being right about small things and have needless arguments with people I love. I’d like to let that go. And for the people I don’t love, I’d like to let it all go. Then I can truly shine.
Shining Means is a Monthly Project for May 2017. You can read more about my projects for 2017 here. You can read about the start of this project here.
 This month’s project is related to One Little Word. Ali asked us to write questions pertaining to our word and think about what it means. I did this last year, too, and I loved it so I decided it was another opportunity for me to reconnect with my word.
This card says: Shining means being intentional about how you are showing up in your life. Paying attention to what lights you up and what makes you shutdown. Stepping back to ensure your choices are intentional and not incremental or external. Being the best.
This is such a big part of shining for me. Being mindful and understanding myself. It’s so easy to do the next thing and not think about how little things add up to represent my life and whether I am ok with spending my life this way.
It’s also easy not to pay attention to what lights me up and what shuts me down. I light up when I am in the sun. When I have coffee with a good friend. When I am reading. When I am painting. Listening to music. Taking a walk with my family. Hugging any of my boys!
What shuts me down is being put down. Being around people who think very highly of themselves. When I let someone down. When I am not appropriately dressed for an occasion. When there’s sarcasm or irony or unkindness. When I feel unworthy or less than.
I want to ensure to fill my life with places, things and people that make me shine!
Shining Means is a Monthly Project for May 2017. You can read more about my projects for 2017 here.
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projects for twenty twenty-four
projects for twenty twenty-three
projects for twenty twenty-two
projects for twenty twenty-one
projects for twenty nineteen
projects for twenty eighteen
projects from twenty seventeen
monthly projects from previous years
some of my previous projects
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