Catalyst 95 – I don’t Want to Choose

Catalyst Ninety-Five is: What’s something you struggle with?.

I made a list of all the things I would like to do. I constantly struggle with choosing which thing to do, to learn. I want them all. I made a list and printed it as my background.

Here’s what’s in the list: Teach David how to read. Learn Russian. Get a PhD. Study Mathematics. Learn to sew. Learn to crochet. Drive fearlessly. Visit Antarctica. Ride on a hot air ballon. Write a novel. Write another novel. Learn to ballroom dance. Learn to draw. Really well. Play the saxophone. Read. read. read. a lot. Learn Hebrew. Visit New Zealand, Australia, and Africa. Pet a penguin. Master web design. Teach Nathaniel to read. Teach both my kids math. Spend oodles of family time together laughing and hugging and playing. See the Northern Lights in Alaska. Drive across the country again. See all of the states. Go camping. Write a product that I am really proud of and one that becomes popular. Learn to quilt and make a huge quilt for our bed. Get my coaching license. Learn to ride a bike. Make beautiful art journals. Teach courses. Let go. Journal every day. Run a marathon. Cook more and better. Start my own non-profit. Run a non-profit bookstore. Embrace imperfection. Publish a book with my photography. Take a lot more photographs. Master post-processing. Master photography. Become fluent in Japanese, Italian and French. And Sign Language. Go to an art retreat. Let go. Stop seeking validation. Embrace joy. Make a movie. Create art products. Affect the education system. Let go. Learn to paint. Acrylic. Oil. Learn wood carving and metal smithing. Learn more about physics. Chemistry. Statistics. Become a therapist. Learn to decorate a cake. Master design principles. Have a photo shoot with my family. Read all the classics. Go to the movies. Take daily photos. Make more scrapbook pages. Tell our stories. Tell my parents’ stories. Tell my grandparents’ stories. Collect family photos. Find my own style. Let go. Embrace myself and the way I look. Make lifelong friends. Spend regular time with good friends. Apologize from people I’ve hurt. Donate to charity. Volunteer. Learn to knit in the round and to knit a cable. Change a tire. Make wreaths. Make bread. Take photos of myself everyday for a year. Reach out to family more and connect. Take a trip alone. Watch the sun rise and the sun set on the same day. Bake a pie. Let go. Make a really complicated dish. Walk across the Brooklyn bridge and the Golden Gate bridge. Declutter. Practice kindness towards others and myself. Let go.