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WEEKLY BOOKS - THE GUERNSEY LITERARY AND POTATO PEEL PIE SOCIETY  I have been meaning to read The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society for months. When I was pregnant and my sister was visiting, she bought the book for a friend and I started reading it then but never really got into it. So I shied away from picking it up for months but last week I decided it was finally time.
As it turns out, it was absolutely delightful. I loved the format of letters written back and forth among multiple characters and the stories and the characters were very colorful, lovable and fun to watch. Had I known it was sort of about the second world war, I would likely have not touched it at all. It was a relatively small part of the book tone-wise but still anything about that bothers me. In the end, I am glad I read it and would highly recommend this pithy yet quick read.  DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 30 2009  I've officially moved downstairs so I can smell and see the tree while I work. I spent the afternoon working at the dinner table and Nathaniel, who doesn't seem to want to be anywhere but right by me lately, decided to play right under the table.  And then David joined him, too.  All while I was having a video conference. Nice eh? And when he finally ventured away, it was towards the kitchen where there are too many things that he shouldn't be going near. So I had to give up on the table and move to the couch where there's lots of open carpet. (and the Christmas tree but that's going to be an adventure either way.  I put some small lights in the other living room, too, which is where our stockings live.  Those weird green lights on the stockings are from the UV filter on my lens, gotta remember to take that off. Today was very unproductive but I did take Nathaniel to the doctor and he's gained 1.5lbs in the last month. The doctor had wanted him to gain at least a pound so we're good! Still at 12% but he wasn't worried. Nathaniel got his second flu shot and didn't even flinch. Here's to a more productive tomorrow. December, here we come! DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 29 2009  I started out the morning by finishing my book (more on that tomorrow) while Nathaniel napped and then played a little.  Then we took out the ornaments. I realized most of the lights were not working so we had to take another break. When Nathaniel went down to nap, I drove to Walmart and bought a ton of new lights. Now we were ready to decorate. David helped me, of course.  And Nathaniel watched us and was quiet, mostly.  And here's the finished tree with the lights on. It was late at this point so there was no light out.  And here's one with the lights off.  Yes, the tree is crooked. But I love it anyway. I love Christmas. I love smelling the tree. Seeing the twinkles. I loved every little thing about the holiday season. And now I am tired and need to rest before Nathaniel wakes up for milk. CATALYST 90 - COMPLIMENTS  My words: I have a hard time accepting compliments. When someone says something nice, I am immediately embarrassed and start saying that it wasn’t that hard, or it’s not that great, or it looks better than it is. Anything. I’ll say anything to take the focus away from me and from the gratitude someone is showing me. One time, a friend to me to stop doing that and just to say thank you. I’m working on it.  I wanted to create a bouquet of flowers (like someone presenting flowers to me.) with wire and beads. I learned this technique from the amazing Rebecca Sower. She inspires me endlessly. DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 28 2009  I bought Nathaniel some puffs the other day and he's enjoying them quite a bit. He likes playing with them as much as eating them. Take note of how many are stuck to his arms.  Lest you think it's just the arms, several on the floor too.  He does like eating them, too. When I undressed him tonight to put him down, I noticed at least five stuck inside his clothes, maybe he was saving them for later.  I finished all my layouts and David's book with the AMM kit from this month. I am still reading my book for the week but I might be able to finish tonight, if not, definitely tomorrow. I've noticed a spike in comments lately, I am not sure where you're coming from, but that you so much, knowing that people are here, reading, and communicating back really makes my heart happy. Five days to my Big Picture Scrapbooking class on reclaiming my time. I am officially excited. 52 QUESTIONS AND TECHNIQUES - TAG 47  The first childhood memory I have is of my sister teaching me how to read. By far, the best memory I have. This was the biggest gift anyone ever gave me. Thank you, Yona! I covered the back of the tag with a page from a Dickens novel. I inked around it. Added a butterfly wing to show how reading gave me wings. Another button with words on it and a little flower and that's it for this tag. I gave a big of a sparkle with some Stickles around the edge.  I now sell some of these tags in my etsy store. If there's a tag you like and are interested in, email me or leave a comment and I'll be happy to add it. I am combining Emily Falconbridge's art journal questions with trying a new technique each week. You can see the full list: here. Weekly tags are posted every Thursday, you can see all of them by clicking here. DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 27 2009  I had read that it wasn't raining in Half Moon Bay where the farm is but as it turned out, it was. Which is why this photo is as magnificent as it is. And this next one, too.  I'd read that the Grand Firs were the most pungent of all the trees and I wanted something that smelled a lot and would last the longest. So once we found our tree, Jake got to work. I tried to help but I am not sure I was useful at all.  Nathaniel watched pretty quietly most of the time.  And when he wasn't, his big brother was there to soothe him.  After we got the tree up and netted and tied, we rode the little train and listened to Christmas songs, we drank cider and even watched a super-short puppet show. A bunch more hard work from Jake, a lot of trimming, a huge mess, and the tree is now in our house. I attempted to take a shot of it but trees and I, we don't seem to get a long. I will make another attempt tomorrow, I promise. After all the kids went to bed, I dug into the December kit from AMM and already finished three layouts. I have a few more to make and David's school mini. I even made the 47th tag. Of course, I didn't finish my book yet and still have my writing homework to do and six more items on the todo list but I will get to them all in due time. And, of course, tomorrow....we decorate the tree! Christmas season has officially begun and I couldn't be happier. PHOTOGRAPHY TIPS - LENSES - MACRO Today's video is a continuation in the lenses series. We cover macros today. Lenses used to take photos of teeny tiny things. Next week, more lenses. Feel free to let me know if anything is unclear or if you have questions. Photography Tips is a weekly feature and is posted every Friday. You can find all of them here. DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 26 2009  Our day started out ok but went downhill quickly when Nathaniel decided to skip his midday nap. He cried and cried so I finally gave up and we went out to the track so Jake could do his run.  Doesn't he look amazing? While he was running David played and smiled and was generally happy.  Even Nathaniel was smiling but don't let that fool you, he was cranky.  Not this one, though. Sweet as ever.  When Jake finished, David did a run around the track, too.  Then we went home and I foolishly thought that Nathaniel would finally fall asleep. But no. He slept for 20 minutes and he was up. While he was sleeping, I got all of our food into bowls and started cooking the broccoli and butternut squash. Even though he was sitting next to me after he woke up, he whined and cried the entire time. He wanted my attention on nothing but him. I then put him down at 4 again and he still wouldn't take a nap so I finally just gave up. I'm not one to care too much about Thanksgiving. I didn't grow up here so I never had the tradition. And often times there's too much family around. I am more of a one-on-one person and get easily stressed with too many people around, even if it's the people I am closest to. And since we had no one visiting this year, I thought Jake was going to be happy skipping Thanksgiving altogether. But it turned out he wanted to have it. So last night we went to Whole Foods and got a few items we loved: a roasted chicken, mashed potatoes, roasted vegetables, Israeli cous cous, mac'n'cheese, and stuffing. Today, he went to get rolls, cranberry sauce, and a pumpkin pie at the grocery store. I made the same butternut squash casserole from a week ago and some broccoli (with a little cheese and onions.) We had enough food for 16 people and it was really just me and Jake since David's a picky eater and only wanted to eat rolls. (In the end he did eat some of the squash, chicken, mac'n'cheese, and stuffing, too. And pumpkin pie with ice cream of course.)  All in all, despite the lack of naps and much crying, it was a wonderful, peaceful and quiet thanksgiving. We're all full, happy and feeling thankful for so much of what we have. If you live in the US, I hope your Thanksgiving was special, too. DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 25 2009  He's so awesome.  And here's one of those puzzling eyes.  This promises to be a quiet Thanksgiving in the karenika household. It's just us four. We've got the food all set and plan to rest, relax and enjoy each other's company. My little boy is seven months old now and the big one's almost five. Time passes all too quickly. See you tomorrow. WEEKLY DIGITAL DOWNLOADS - HOLIDAY TICKETS This week's download is a set of holiday themed tickets. These are PNG files so they can be recolored as you wish. You can also make a new file, drag them all on to it and print it out on kraft cardstock and cut them out like actual tickets. That's what I intend to do. Here's what's in there:  You can download it here: holiday tickets set download. You are welcome to play with these as much as you want and use them anywhere you'd like. You are NOT allowed to sell them ever. You don't have to but I'd appreciate a link back if you do use them. This is part of a weekly digital download series. They are posted every Wednesday. You can find all of the ones that were posted here. WEEKLY LAYOUT - SWEEP YOU UP  Journaling Reads: Nathaniel, seeing this sweet face of yours crunched up into so many pieces breaks my heart. It makes me want to pick you up and smother you with kisses. Hug you so tight that you can feel my heart beating on yours. It makes me want to protect you for the rest of your life. Make sure no one can ever cause you harm. Make sure you will never feel sorrow or loneliness or heartbreak. But I know that I can't stop those things. I know that you will have your share of sad moments and I will just have to pray that they are short and far in between. I can't stop some of these bad things from happening to you. But, right now, while you're still so tiny and feeling so much sorrow, I can scoop you up and hold you close to my heart. I can still turn that sad face into a happy one. And, for as long as I can, I will do it over and over again. DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 24 2009  David had Thanksgiving at school today and he tried peanut butter for the first time and really liked it.  Nathaniel is so mobile now that it's hard to get a non-blurry shot.  Another day with no to-dos. Working on it. I am sure it will catch up with me but trying to stay calm and relaxed as much as I can. Let's see if I'll get to finish tomorrow's digital downloads. Let me know if there's anything you want. WEEKLY BOOKS - THE SWEETNESS AT THE BOTTOM OF THE PIE 
What a great book The Sweetness at the Bottom of the Pie was! A fantastic job writing from a young girl's point of view. Wonderful details. As someone who also loves chemistry, what a delightful character. What a great plot. I really enjoyed every single moment of this story.
I think I read about this book in Wendy Smedley's blog and I wrote down the name and decided that it looked like fun. I am not the type to read mysteries all that often (I don't really read much genre fiction at all) but this one was truly magnificent. Mostly because the characters were well thought out and kept the whole story going. Highly recommended. DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 23 2009  Nathaniel is fully crawling now and discovering the world as he likes.  A wonderful, quiet day where I didn't give myself any todos. Which meant I could take some time to do math with David tonight and I am enjoying this lack of pressure. CATALYST 89 - BABY  my words: As I’ve written about several times before, in 2002, I quit my job on Wall St. to become a teacher for Teach for America. Relatively soon after I began teaching, I started having serious doubts about my ability to do this job justice. It was a very turbulent time in my life and I still struggle with it from time to time. One of the things I did at the time was to take a course in the hopes that it would help me decide whether I was ready to quit the job or not. At the end of this intensive three day course, I had many answers to many other issues in my life but I still didn’t know if I should walk away. A few weeks later, I was telling someone why I had originally chosen to go into the computer field (so I could work from home one day when I had kids) and then why I had quit the wall street career for a more altruistic one (so that what I did with my time away from my kids would be for a worthwhile cause). In talking to this person, I realized that I had made many significant decisions in my life on behalf of children I didn’t yet have. I also recognized that I had managed to setup my life such that I was working way too many hours to actually make room to have any kids. As soon as I realized this, I quit my job, encouraged my unhappy husband to do the same (and pursue his dreams) and we moved across the country to setup a new life and within a year of moving we were expecting our first baby. I know that if it weren’t for the course, and for the struggles with my teaching job, I might have never stepped back enough to observe my life and notice how misaligned it was with my priorities. Sometimes an unfortunate circumstance can be the catalyst to something wonderful and amazing. DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 22 2009  Here's the back.  And I can slip my pen into the side.  Nathaniel is really not a fan of peas. I've tried giving them to him twice now and each time he's gagged and made the saddest faces. I am not sure if it's dislike or he might be allergic somehow so I am staying away from peas for a while.  Relatively happy Sunday here. Finished my book (will post tomorrow), played with my kids, watched some TV, and wrote a little. Hope your weekend was good. I woke up today with a little melancholy and sadness but then I remembered that I did indeed find my ring and I felt better. I thought it was odd that the feeling had become so ingrained in just two days and that my memory hadn't really caught up yet. 52 QUESTIONS AND TECHNIQUES - TAG 46  The first thing that came to my mind was laughter. Laughter and love make me glow. Simple one this time, I pulled all my scraps, a bunch of border punches and just had fun. Simple but I still love it.  I now sell some of these tags in my etsy store. If there's a tag you like and are interested in, email me or leave a comment and I'll be happy to add it. I am combining Emily Falconbridge's art journal questions with trying a new technique each week. You can see the full list: here. Weekly tags are posted every Thursday, you can see all of them by clicking here. DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 21 2009  And then I cooked some creamed spinach and this delicious butternut squash casserole. Mmmm.  Nathaniel was in a good mood most of the day.  And so was the boy with blue eyes.  He's about to stand up any moment now. It's all happening too too fast.  I had a pretty good day. Especially since I found my ring! I cooked veggies, ate veggies, did some art, made a journal for my upcoming class, read some, watched some TV and am about to read more. Not too shabby. DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 20 2009  Nathaniel likes crawling towards me so it's a bit harder to take photos now.  He's also discovered the door stoppers and has been having a ton of fun playing with them.  Still sad about the ring. Really enjoyed watching New Moon. Also enjoying my book of the week. And really thankful and excited about Stephanie's new journaling clas. Nothing like journaling and Stephanie is amazing. Happy weekend! PHOTOGRAPHY TIPS - LENSES - WIDE ANGLE This week's video is on wide angle lenses. Next week, more lenses. Feel free to let me know if anything is unclear or if you have questions. Photography Tips is a weekly feature and is posted every Friday. You can find all of them here. DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 19 2009  Nathaniel was rummaging around the toy drawers.  David kissed him a bunch.  And then Sandra's little boy woke up.  And even gave me a little smile!  Today was a sad day cause when I came back from picking up David I realized I lost my right that I wear on my index finger. A beautiful elegant ring with diamonds on it. I haven't found it yet and I don't think I will so I am really really sorry. I seem to have the worst luck with jewelry. I am so sorry Mom!! Off to bed now cause I need some sleep before I go see New Moon!!! DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 18 2009  Here's David playing with his friend at school. This girl and David have been friends for a long time now. They get along really well.  And cutie-pie Nathaniel.  Still quite tired. This is a good but long week. Monday night I met with my friend Jenn, tonight we have a dinner guest, and tomorrow night I go to see New Moon at midnight. So I am going to be even more tired on Friday but it's worth it. Today, David, Nathaniel and I had lunch together. We went to the Palo Alto Cafe and had bagels and shared an orange juice. It was so wonderful. I hope your Wednesday is going well, too. WEEKLY DIGITAL DOWNLOADS - HOLIDAY JOURNALING TAGS This week's download is a set of journaling tags that are holiday themed. For decemmber daily or any other holiday album you like to make.  You can download it here: holiday journaling tags download. You are welcome to play with these as much as you want and use them anywhere you'd like. You are NOT allowed to sell them ever. You don't have to but I'd appreciate a link back if you do use them. This is part of a weekly digital download series. They are posted every Wednesday. You can find all of the ones that were posted here. REJECTION Before we had kids, Jake and I used to go back to Istanbul regularly. Each time we went home, my parents would take me to a new local place and we would always run into people I knew. Always. Istanbul has over 12 million people. Yet we would run into the same people over and over again. I was flabbergasted by this. Until, I realized, of course, that the people I knew all went to the same few places. This is always the case in a small community. People tend to go to the same places, know the same people, like the same things, and talk about the same issues. Therefore, it should not have surprised me to run into the same people everywhere I went, even in a city with a population of 12 million. It's like a sub-culture within a big, dense city. Yet, when the exact same thing happened lately, I failed to recognize it again. The web is even more populated than Istanbul (by quite a bit) yet it felt like everyone whose site I read knew each other. Everyone I was following on Twitter was talking about each other. It felt like I was a voyeur into someone else's popular clique and I kept feeling like an outsider. Like the rejected girl (as I often have felt in my life.) Until I realized that the same phenomenon that happened in Istanbul was happening here. I kept running into the same people because I found them by clicking on each other's blogs. I followed them because one person I followed was following them, etc. Since they referred to each other often (as they are friends) I had soon built a long list of people who were already connected and built that list exactly because they were connected and then I proceeded to forget all about this and feel like an unpopular kid (those childhood feelings are hard to disappear and come back rushing very quickly). Like Istanbul, the web has niches. In these niches some people are wildly popular even though no one has heard of them outside this relatively small niche. Yet, if you're observing this niche, it's really quite easy to lose perspective of it all. And to think this person is more unreachable (untouchable) than they really are. in the end, this is just a bunch of friends who all happen to have blogs, twitter accounts, etc. who are using these popular forms of communication to document and keep in touch with each other. The only difference here is that tens, thousands, millions of people get to observe this if they so choose. This creates an interesting dynamic. One that I am still thinking about and trying to see how I feel about. I am trying to remind myself that this is not me getting rejected. This is a bunch of people I don't know sharing a piece of themselves and letting me read it. I am not sure what my point is here, of course. Some days, I feel really sad and want to unfollow many of these people. Then I remember that I chose them cause I like their words, the way they encourage me to think and ponder. And the feeling of rejection is really just living inside me, not coming from these people. Even though I know this, it still sometimes hurts. WEEKLY LAYOUTS - YOU SHOULD KNOW  Journaling Reads: 1. I love reading. I can read just about anything. I can read for six, seven hours at a time and never get tired. 2. I kept daily journals from 1984 to 1992. I still cherish those journals a lot. 3. I have a funny dance that I do when I feel really happy. 4. I used to drink twelve diet cokes a day before I got pregnant. 5. I am afraid of the dark. 6. I grind my teeth. I have been doing it since I was a little girl. It used to drive Yona crazy. 7. I can touch my nose with my tongue. 8. Getting my eyes fixed was one of the best things I ever did. 9. I am not a morning person. 10. I wish were a better driver. A less scared one. 11. I absolutely love your Dad with all my heart. 12. As soon as I learned how to read in English, I started reading books in English. I used to ask Yona and my mom drive me all over Istanbul just to find a store that sold books in English. 13. My first computer was a Commodore 64. I didn't get a real computer until I was in college. Now I have six computers, almost all of them are Macintoshes. 14. My favorite meal is coffee and graham crackers or bread and cheese. Or chocolate. Yes, it's a meal. 15. I have been clumsy all my life. 16. I always wished I could draw really well. Or have some artistic talent like my mom does. 17. When I was a little girl, I was really shy and I cried a lot. 18. I've always loved math. Solving puzzles. Figuring things out. I still love it. 19. I watch a lot of TV. I like the noise when I work. 20. I loved living in New York City and still miss it often. 21. I love listening to opera. 22. I am not a fan of feet. But I like mine. 23. I think good friendships are rare and should really be nourished. 24. I think music can bring sunshine into the darkest day. 25. I have half-written two novels and am working on the third. 26. I love watching Broadway shows and the theatre. 27. I have always enjoyed learning new things and miss school a lot. I plan to have a PhD. someday. 28. The first time I went camping I was twenty-nine. I loved it. 29. I always wished I had blue eyes. Or green. 30. I love taking photos. DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 17 2009  David read a story to Nathaniel today. Even though it was in Turkish. And he can't read.  And here are two smiley photos of my smiley boys.   And a cute looking face he made today.  Feeling exceptionally tired lately. So tired that I am in physical pain. I hope I am not getting sick. DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 16 2009  Nathaniel has been really attached to me lately. He's happy and peaceful sitting next to me but if I leave even to take a photo, this is what I get.  I know it's a phase but it breaks my heart to see him sad. I have a lot more I want to write but I actually went out to see a good friend tonight and I am way too tired and need to go to sleep so the rest will have to wait until tomorrow. WEEKLY BOOKS - OLIVE KITTERIDGE  After John Irving, I wanted something less dense but I was also hooked on high quality and didn't want something too light. In comes Olive Kitteridge. I've wanted to read this book for a while and have read and wrote briefly about her previous novel. I don't even like short stories but the only one I remember liking was similar to this in that it was a collection of linked stories.
I must like that because I get the chance to get to know a character deeply almost like a novel. These stories were all full quiet sorrow but I loved them. They made me think. They made me think a lot, actually. I really, really enjoyed this book and devoured it quite quickly. Highly recommended. CATALYST 88 - THE THREE BOYS  Here's my journaling These three men in my life have taught me what it means to love and to be loved. They are the reason I wake up in the morning and the reason I go to bed at night and feel happy and blessed every moment in between. Until I met Jake I didn’t know what it meant to be with someone who can love me just the way I am and who can make me feel whole. Until I had my boys, I didn’t know what it meant to love so much that it pysically hurt my heart. These men make me feel whole. They make me feel thankful and blessed and lucky. So so lucky. I don’t know what I did to deserve this but I am not taking it for granted for one single moment. I hold them and kiss them and hug them as many times a day I can. Thank you, my boys. All of the beautiful digital elements here are by Anna Aspnes. DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 15 2009  Moments like this are worth more than gold.  Extremely tired this weekend. Beyond words. 52 QUESTIONS AND TECHNIQUES - TAG 45  I've been stuck on the Google Android song. Each time I see the commercial, it makes me happy. It's "If you want to Sing out, sing out" by Cat Stevens. Wonderful song. So many simple but amazing lyrics. Simple tag this time. I covered it with a music sheet. Inked edges. Made a little birdie from fabric, stitched around it. Put it on a brown "branch" made out of ribbon lace. And wrote the song title.  I now sell some of these tags in my etsy store. If there's a tag you like and are interested in, email me or leave a comment and I'll be happy to add it. I am combining Emily Falconbridge's art journal questions with trying a new technique each week. You can see the full list: here. Weekly tags are posted every Thursday, you can see all of them by clicking here. DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 14 2009  Nathaniel, who was cranky all day, sat behind him and watched.  We also played with stamps and played games and hugged and chatted with my mom and dad over Skype for a long time. Good day. I spent the day making my very first Etsy journal (thank you Karla, you're awesome!) and it was so much fun. I've also been reading my book of the week and am more than halfway through. I still have a lot of todo items on my list but I am feeling at peace with it all. DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 13 2009  And look how much he's wanting to get up.  Long and a bit of a dreadful week. Here's to next week being better. Happy weekend. PHOTOGRAPHY TIPS - LENSES - ZOOM VS FIXED Today's video starts our several-week-long lens videos. We start with the discussion on zoom lenses vs fixed lenses. Hope you like it. Feel free to let me know if anything is unclear or if you have questions. Next week is more lenses. Photography Tips is a weekly feature and is posted every Friday. You can find all of them here. WEEKLY BOOKS - LAST NIGHT IN TWISTED RIVER  I am a huge John Irving fan. I've read almost every single novel he wrote. Like most of his other fans, I'm sure, A Prayer for Owen Meany, Cider House Rules, and The World According to Garp top my list of favorites. And if I were being completely honest, I'd also say that I didn't like The Fourth Hand at all. It just wasn't up to Irving's amazing caliber.
Until I Find You also wasn't a major favorite of mine. So when I found out about Last Night in Twister River I was mixed. Oh not true. I wasn't at all. There was no doubt I was reading it. But I really really hoped it was like the older Irving work. And you know what? It was! It was it was it was. This was a dense, fascinating, epic novel. I loved it. Not as much as the other three maybe but really loved it. Thank you John Irving. DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 12 2009  I love this one cause you can clearly see the second tooth coming out.  And here he looks just like me when I was a baby. It's really odd to have a kid who looks like you. Never had that before.  David's been totally addicted to playing games on my iPhone and honestly I don't think it's terrible to let him play. Especially since he wrote every one of the letters of the alphabet yesterday. I am so proud of him.  Semi-productive day today. I did finish my tag but it was already too dark to take a photo so it's coming tomorrow. DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 11 2009  And today they played together for a long time.  David laughed and laughed.  And so did Nathaniel. He was even giggling watching his brother entertain him.  This is also from yesterday, while I was chatting with my sister, I told her I had to go to the bathroom so could she please watch Nathaniel. I think she did a great job, all the way from Turkey.  And Nathaniel really loves eating that phone.  It's that or the laptop, so we've compromised.  A lot of photos but too tired for words. Happy Wednesday. WEEKLY DIGITAL DOWNLOADS - TREE DATES SET This week's download is a set of numbers designed for those of you doing Ali Edwards' December Daily. (I am doing it, too!) Here are some examples of what's in there:  You can also use the trees like a layered template like this:  You can download it here: tree dates set download. You are welcome to play with these as much as you want and use them anywhere you'd like. You are NOT allowed to sell them ever. You don't have to but I'd appreciate a link back if you do use them. This is part of a weekly digital download series. They are posted every Wednesday. You can find all of the ones that were posted here. DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 10 2009  Today, I put him down on the carpet in David's class.  It took him seconds to get going.  He only stopped to watch his brother.  Who gave him his daily kiss and a hug before we left to go back home.  How can one not be thankful for this life? I've been worrying about work and not being as productive as I'd like lately but yet yesterday a workmate said some wonderfully appreciative words to me and I felt so thankful that I saved them so I could go back and look next time I felt insecure. And today he did something even nicer. It's nice to feel appreciated. If there's someone you're appreciating, make sure to tell them. You never know, you might make their day. He sure made mine. WEEKLY LAYOUT - WITH ALL MY HEART  David, in just a few months, you are going to be five years old. I can't believe you've already grown up so much and I am amazed every single day at how much you're maturing. You are one of the kindest boys I know. You always share your toys with everyone. You say thank you and please and I'm sorry. You are generous and loving with your little brother and love to give him hugs and kisses. You shriek from excitement when you go to school and when you come home. The littlest things can make you so happy. Like having graham crackers instead of oatmeal for breakfast. Like going to the grocery store with Daddy. You always say things like "You're the best Mommy ever." or "I had a fantastic day." You've been practicing your letters and can write most of them perfectly. You can spell your name and my name and Daddy's name and you're working on Nathaniel's too. You can count all the way to a hundred and you practice constantly. You have mastered the Wii and the Tivo remote and the iPod video. And the games on my iPhone. You make jokes all the time and laugh out loud. You snuggle under the covers with me and hold my hand. You say goodnight words every night. Three kisses and three hugs. I love you, I'll see you in the morning, Don't let the bed bugs bite and I love you with all my heart. Every night. I have no idea how I got to be so lucky. How I got to have a son as incredible as you. But I am thankful for it every single day. I love you, my son. With all my heart. WORD OF THE YEAR JOURNALS  First of all, thank you for all your plethora of suggestions about what to sell on my etsy store. I think there are some awesome ideas and I will try most of them, slowly. Last week, I was lying in bed when the idea for this book came to me. I loved making my december daily book and recently I was looking at creative therapy catalyst book and realizing that it was my art journal for the year and I loved it so much. So I decided to make those for my store. My word for 2010 is LOVED and I love the idea of having an art journal dedicated to my word of the year. I love how beckoning this cover is for me. How it already makes me feel loved. So I decided to make custom journals. Covers. The inside pages are for you to fill. If you really want one with inside pages, let me know and we can discuss. I really enjoy making these and thought maybe people will like having them. So, here they are: custom word of the year journals. More detailed photos there. Hope you like them. DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 9 2009  David's still working on his letters. He's awesome. Doing really well.  I am not sure you can see it but tooth number two is also out and visible now.  Happy Monday. CATALYST 87 - READING  If I had all the extra time in the world and my kids and husband were sleeping, I would spend most of it reading. The joy I get from getting lost in a novel is unparalleled. And Dickens is one of my favorites.  DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 8 2009  We played on our bed for a long time.  And David just kissed his brother over and over again. I swear I didn't pose him one bit. I think he sees me kiss Nathaniel so much that he likes doing it too.  All in all, a sweet weekend here. I am almost done with my etsy journal, I'll post it early this week I am hoping. 52 QUESTIONS AND TECHNIQUES - TAG 44  I make all the big, important decisions with my heart. I wanted something different this time. I cut out the canvas, put some watercolor paint, a lot of water, wire heart, rope heart, felt heart, and a bunch of sewing. Not my favorite but had fun.  I now sell some of these tags in my etsy store. If there's a tag you like and are interested in, email me or leave a comment and I'll be happy to add it. I am combining Emily Falconbridge's art journal questions with trying a new technique each week. You can see the full list: here. Weekly tags are posted every Thursday, you can see all of them by clicking here. DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 7 2009  And here's the little one in action. He's fast and loves to go under my desk. I'm going to have to get the gates for the stairs very soon.  I am only 100 pages into my 500 page book for this week. I might or might not get to finish. I am hoping to but it's been a bit too hectic. DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 6 2009  As of last night, Nathaniel is full-on crawling. I have never had a baby this mobile this young before, I am a bit afraid. And he now has two visible teeth.  Isn't he the cutest?  Lots of todos this weekend but I think I am going to take it easy and do whatever I actually feel like doing. Happy Weekend! PHOTOGRAPHY TIPS - FLASH Today's video is about flash. And how you should never use it. Feel free to let me know if anything is unclear or if you have questions. Next week is lenses. Photography Tips is a weekly feature and is posted every Friday. You can find all of them here. EVERYDAY IS YOUR BIRTHDAY Jake and I were talking about birthdays a few weeks ago. How we treat people extra-special when it's their birthday. How we feel it's ok to ask for a little more special treatment when it's our birthday. It made me wonder why we don't do this more often. Why we reserve the extra-special for birthdays. I know, it's once a year and it's easier and more realistic to drop everything and prioritize someone once a year. But imagine if we picked a select few people in our lives and decided we would treat them as if it was their birthday every single day. So you could always treat them with a little something special? Maybe special would lose its meaning then? Since every day will be special and all... But I think not. I think it would make the relationship that much stronger. That much better and deeper. And wouldn't it be cool to know that you don't have to wait for their birthday to make those special pancakes, to give that awesome gift, to make them feel as special as they are in your life? It just feels right to me. I want my loved ones to know that everyday is their birthday. That I can make them feel special every day. I want to. DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 5 2009  Nathaniel had napped a lot this morning so when we went to pick David, I suggested we take a fun detour. So we went to get ice cream. And ate it before lunch. Sometimes you just have to eat your dessert first. A little more productive today but it's still continuing to be not-the-best-week-ever. DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 4 2009  Not a productive day. I haven't been able to find my groove this week. Weeks like this frustrate me. But I am telling myself it's going to be ok. WEEKLY DIGITAL DOWNLOADS - CIRCULAR MONTHS This week's download is a request. Month names in a circle. Here's an example of what's in there:  You can download it here: circular months set download. You are welcome to play with these as much as you want and use them anywhere you'd like. You are NOT allowed to sell them ever. You don't have to but I'd appreciate a link back if you do use them. This is part of a weekly digital download series. They are posted every Wednesday. You can find all of the ones that were posted here. WEEKLY LAYOUTS - HOLD ON LITTLE GIRL  It's a photo of me when I was little. Here's what the journaling reads: I look at this picture and I see this little girl who looks like she's having a good time. It's her birthday. Maybe the third one. She doesn't look sad to me. She doesn't look like life has broken her yet. I want to take her into my arms and give her a hug. I want to tell her that she's going to go through some rough patches in her life. That she will be teased mercilessly, rejected by her so-called friends. She will feel lonely and sad and some of these feelings will stay with her for the rest of her life. She will feel an insurmountable need to run away. To start fresh. She will think that she can't trust anyone to keep her secrets. She will pour her heart out to her diaries. For years. She will feel like if only she could leave and start over, another life, another place, she could fix it all. She will be loved but it won't feel like it's enough. There will be years of feeling small and feeling sad. Alone. I want to give her a hug and tell her to just hold on. To have faith. Because on the other side of this sorrow and loneliness, she will find an amazing life. She will make forever friends. She will find a man who loves her as deeply as she loves him. She will have two amazing children and feel more love than she imagined possible. A successful career that she actually enjoys. She will travel. She will experience life. She will discover art. And photography. And writing. Books will save her life over and over again. She will be loved. Truly loved. I want to tell this little girl her life will be amazing. She will have to go through some turbulence to get there but it will be worth every second of it. I want to hold her and say: Hold on, little girl, it's all waiting for you on the other side. DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 3 2009  Thank you for your kind words to yesterday's post. They mean a lot to me and I am still thinking about it all. Still unsure how to move forward but I'm working on it. In the meantime, I'm spending more time with my son. Working on his letters, reading him bedtime stories. And kissing both of them a ton. Giving myself the space. DAILY PHOTOS - NOVEMBER 2 2009  And the eyes. The eyes that speak right to my soul.  Too sleepy for any more words tonight. Happy Monday. AUTHENTICITY I consider myself a productive person. In an ordinary week, I get a lot done. Here's a typical list: creative therapy art piece, layouts for amm, layouts for the BPS class I am taking, organizing/writing BPS class that I am planning to teach, a new tag, a photography video, a photoshop video, a book to start and finish in the same week, my writing homework for the week, writing for my upcoming submission to the critique in my class, digital downloads for the week, photos every day of the week - taking them, processing them, uploading them, and posting them. Preparing and posting each week's creative therapy catalyst. Emailing artists to see if they would guest for us. Following up on guests that are coming up due. I'm tired just listing them all. And none of these are required. On top of of all this, I have my actual obligations in life. Like my job and my almost five year old and my six month old and my husband. Attending meetings. Taking David back and forth from preschool for two hours a day. Making breakfast, lunch, and dinner for him. Nursing Nathaniel - day and night. And now preparing and giving food to Nathaniel. The thing is, I love being busy. I love scrapping, taking photos, doing art, reading, writing. I love it all. But because I am doing it all, I am always in such a rush that I can't seem to enjoy any of it. I find myself running from one task to another. Making 27 item-long todo lists each weekend. Telling my son he has to go to bed without a story so mommy can do her stuff. Not replying to emails. Not inviting friends over so I can do my stuff. And, on top of all that, I am not even happy with what I do. I often find myself seeking validation. I annoy my husband to read my words, to look at my pages. I post them online and refresh constantly for feedback, never believing the good stuff and constantly reading into the words, looking for the criticism. I am obviously not made out of whatever it takes to do this stuff. Ten times a day, I think of withdrawing myself from everything. Giving up all my obligations (most of which are to myself) and just living life. But I also know that being busy is what stops me from going crazy. From being depressed. And as I mentioned a few days ago, I often need a purpose to execute. I think the trick is to find a little more balance. To take the time to seriously sit down and analyze which parts I enjoy the most. While there might be days I don't enjoy having to remember to take a photo, I love seeing daily photos of my son. And I love that because of that practice I have some amazing photos of both of my sons. Of our lives. Of our events. I love creative therapy. I love the environment it's created on the web. I love the guests we've had. The art I've done. The team we have. I love reading. I love the layouts that focus on the words and the photos. I love having our scrapbook pages to look at, the stories I get to remember, the moments I get to preserve. And I've been getting a lot out of the videos, digital work, classes, etc, too. But I can't do it all. I don't want to do it all. I want to be able to do art for four hours one night and not worry about the other items on my list. Or read for seven hours. Or just be with my kids and do workbooks. Read stories. So something's gotta give. I don't know what yet. I feel too sad giving any of it up. But as the holiday season approaches and I get to have more days at home with my kids and I think about gratitude and family and thankfulness, I want to look within and see what fulfills me the most right now. Yes, I love the idea of writing that novel, but I am not really loving writing it right now. Maybe it's ok to let it go. It doesn't mean I failed. Living my life authentically for me. For the values I cherish. And not for looking good for others. Not for validation. Not for approval or admiration. But for joy, love and gratitude. I am going to try to practice that for the next nine weeks. I will still create art and take photos and read books. But I am going to try my hardest to give up the need for validation. I am not even sure I can do it. But I am going to try hard. I think that if I didn't need the validation, I might be a better person. And I know that life would be considerably more pleasant. Here's to nine weeks of authenticity and joy. -- ps: no photoshop video this week. I have no more ideas. If you have ideas of what you'd like to see email me. karen AT karenika DOT com. CATALYST 86 - LOVED  Well this is the book. The one that started the whole thing. The one that led me to start Creative Thrapy. I had put it away a long time ago, not sure what I wanted to do with the cover. I took it out and took a piece of fabric and stitched some interlocked hearts. Some beads and a heart and a note to remember: loved. This book is a reminder that I was loved. I am loved. Daily Photos - November 1 2009  I've been trying to snap a photo of Nathaniel's tiny tooth for weeks. And here we finally are. How cute is that?  And look at my other son. He's stunning.  Great weekend here. Got a lot done. Not all but most of what I hoped to do. And some quality family time of course. What more can a girl ask for? |
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