It's that time again.

It might seem to you as if I go home very often, but to me, if feels like years have passed since the last time I saw my little nephews. My sister. My parents. My brother-in-law. My friends.

This time it's even more special than usual. This time we have a celebration. This time we have Jake's parents and his siblings. This time we get to take our relationship to the next level. To a more permanent one. This time I get to shop for wedding dresses. This time I get to prepare invitations and maybe even party favors.

All of that fills me with anxiety and excitement. But mostly happiness.

This will also be the first time I've been in a plane since the day before my birthday. I don't even want to say the date that seems to roll off people's tongue's so easily lately. It hasn't been that long and I personally haven't adjusted all that well just yet. At least not well enough to have made it part of my vocabulary.

I've never been afraid of riding on a plane. When I was little, my mom would hold my hand on the plane, her palms sweating right into mine. I would tell her that there's nothing to fear, the chances of something going wrong are very low.

I'm uttering the same words to myself now.

I'm not sure things are back to normal. I'm not sure they ever will be. But I am sure that for as long as my family lives that far away, I will regularly have to get on a plane and travel over the Atlantic Ocean. I don't intend to let anyone stop me from being able to do that.

Especially not when it means I get to hug the two little boys I miss the most.

I will try and update frequently from home, but as always, no guarantees, so in the meantime feel free to browse the archives, leave some fun comments, or contact me personally.

And keep smiling.

Previously? Smut or Substance.